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[B]BUT, i kind of feel like he needs to be punished. I don't mind having a sexual relationship, but I DID mind it that he didn't 1) make an effort to call this week, esp. when i indicated last week that it kind of pissed me off; 2) call me since i left my message at 6 p.m. last night. i mean, i know i told him he didn't have to call back, but COME ON.[/B]

it seems like this is a case where a guy is sincerely interested in you and you are pushing him away and playing games. you tell him not to call and get mad when he does but if he doesn't you feel he needs to be punished. you specifically told him he didn't have to call (wow, i am sure that made him feel special and wanted) but expected him to be a mind-reader, read between your tough-guy lines, be a hero, and call.

sorry if my reply sounds rude....but it almost seems like you are scared to be in a relationship or are sending mixed signals to a guy that seems pretty secure in the fact that he likes you and enjoys spending time with you.

i think you need to ask yourself to be honest and assess what YOUR role in this is.... what is so wierd about liking a guy you meet randomly? if you find that to hard to deal with, you will have to look at your guy friends for relationships, but you are not with a guy friend. so you aren't with a friend, you think its wierd to date people who are not your friends....who are you going to date? why are you pushing this guy (who likes you and you have good sex with) away?
Well, if I were in your shoes, I would forget about this guy since he doesn't seem to keep his plans. Action speaks louder than words, right?

Maybe this guy was only interested in you for sex only. I'm alot older than you (50 years young) and in the dating scene too. First of all, I never have sex with a guy on the first date, but that's me. Guys in the past have told me all the time that they lose respect for a female when she's easy.

I think the bottom line here is that you both gave each other mixed messages which is not good because there is no clarity on either end.

Move on until you find a guy that you can enjoy being with both sexually and emotionally.

Good luck to you,
I would also get PO'd ifa friend made tentative plans with me and then didn't bother to get in touch with me until 11pm that night, but that would be a friend. A friend has a higher level of responsibility to you than some strange guy you picked up in a bar. I think it would be safe for you to assume it's just a convenient sex thing with this guy. I think, despite what your friends say, if he were really into you, he'd call you when he says he's going to and he'd keep his commitments to you. I think he texted you on Valentine's Day because he thought it was something he should do. I don't think it means he's "into you, " I wouldn't read too much into it. The real issue here is how consisten he is in his communication with you and in keeping plans with you. But if you're not interested in an emotional commitment, why worry about it? It doesn't matter if he's kinda sorta into you, really into you, not into you at all, or whatever. Just take what he's willing to give and give whatever you're willing to give and enjoy it while it lasts. I mean, I kind of thought that was the whole reason for casual, just sex types of hook ups, is that you don't have to care or worry about whether the other person is into you or not.

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