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Now I'm Mad
Feb 28, 2007
Hi again...

For the majority of my relationship (coming up on three years) I've wondered time and again if I wouldn't be happier breaking up. I'm so tired of being with people who feel the need to constantly obliterate themselves. My ex-boyfriend was a raging alcoholic, and my current boyfriend is a raging stoner. When I met my boyfriend I was myself abusing alcohol so there wasn't really a problem. But I've long since cleaned up my act and I really want to just enjoy life for what it is.

More and more I wonder what it would be like to be with someone who's life didn't revolve around scoring and smoking a drug. It's so sad to me, and it's every single day. If my BF is unable to go one day without finding any weed he'll flip out and go into this big tirade about how terrible and stupid our city is because he can't find any weed. And then he'll have to go out and drink to calm himself down. For the longest time I've tried to rationalize to myself that it's not THAT bad, and that my boyfriend buys me a lot of stuff so that should even things out.

But now something has happened that has me really freaked out. Now, every single one of my BF's friends is also a stoner. I wouldn't even say that he even has REAL friendships, because every time he hangs out with someone, it is with the express purpose to buy weed or smoke it. And most of these people that he associates with I would not choose to be around myself. Anyway, he had this one friend from high school that he met up with again recently, and he would talk all the time about how crazy and unhinged this guy was. And now something happened and this guy is insisting that my boyfriend owes him money (for drugs). I was staying out of it, really, until the other day. My BF got a new cell phone and gave me his old phone because mine was crappy. So a few days ago I started getting messages from this guy (who doesn't know I have the phone now) talking about how my boyfriend had better pay up or else there is going to be trouble.

I freaked and called my boyfriend. He insists the guy is just crazy and that he doesn't owe him any money...that the guy actually stole money from his other friend. But then today there are even more messages on the phone, really scary ones!!! This guy is talking about how he's going to come after my boyfriend, my boyfriend can't hide from him forever, he's going to be in big is making me sick to my stomach!

My BF doesn't seem worried, but I AM! What if this guy really comes after my boyfriend, and worse yet, what if I'm there and something happens to me?!? I am so angry at him for associating with people like this, people that he knows are trouble. I don't want to be involved in crap like this!!! I want a nice, peaceful, calm existence. I'm ready to just throw in the towel and tell him to take a long walk off a short pier.

I'm so sick of this crap. I'm afraid to go to my boyfriend's house now, because what if that guy shows up? His messages are so frightening, and he keeps on calling...he clearly is not going to go away. How can I hang out with my BF and be all happy and cheery knowing that some psycho is after him and who knows when he'll show up? :mad: I don't want this kind of drama in my life. Should I just try to stay away from my boyfriend, or does it sound like I'm overreacted? :confused:

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