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Reading your posts have hit home for me. I have been through all that. A little over three years I was with that jerk. If I would have stayed, I would probably be dead. Me killing myself, or him killing me. Though, when I finally had enough and left, I was so happy to be of free of him. I didn't mourn him- I moved on FAST. It was as if a light bulb went on and told me- this will never change. Ever. No matter what.

I knew that I was probably the best gf he would ever have. I was pretty pathetic actually- I listened to everything he told me to do, never went out with friends, stayed when he cheated on me countless times, COUNTLESS times. So sad. I cleaned, cooked. Did everything I was supposed to. for him. not for me. I never did anything for me.
I was like a prisoner in my own home. I remember feeling like that so often.

I was constantly on a roller coaster with him. Every damn day. It was happy and wonderful, amazing one day. Then the next day he would blow up at me because I thought the sky was bluer than he did- I wasn't allowed to defend myself, or else. Though yes, It was partly my fault. Because I let it happen. It was on me. I didn't have to put up with such abuse- But I did. I accepted the "heart felt apologies". I was younger and naive. I wish I had gotten out sooner- So stupid of me. But I lived and learned and would never in a million years go back to someone like him. I love my life now and wouldn't change it for anything. I know how it's those good days that your holding on to- but the bad out weighs the good by far. Let it go. You can one day find someone who will make you smile from ear to ear EVERYDAY. No more rollercoaster rides.

One thing I know FOR SURE is that if you stay and take such abuse it will never change. It will never change because you let it happen, you accept the apologies, you let his mistakes go. Therefore, he has no reason to change, he can stay the same angered person and you'll accept it- what a wonderful girlfriend :rolleyes:

I have been with my now current boyfriend for 1.5 years, like you. If he EVER EVER treated me like that i'd be out the door faster than lightning. I would never return to such a manipulating relationship- that's NOT real love.

If he really cared or loved you, trust me you would NEVER be crying yourself to sleep, you'd never have to worry about these games hes playing by not picking up his phone to you for days..

I'm sorry to say it but he is probably cheating. What's stopping him? You'd take him back if you found out, He already did it sooo that is just the type of mindset he has- I would hate to be involved with someone who had the mentality of a cheater. How emotionally draining-

If you stay you're wasting your life.. your ONLY life-
Good luck and I hope everything I said made sense :angel:

p.s- he also accused me of cheating almost everday. I never did it once. We would get in these HUUUGE blow out fights because I didn't pick up my phone on time... when in reality he was the one cheating allll the darn time- let these be red flags to you...

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