It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

Pretty Long!
Mar 28, 2007
I'm really worried about my aunt. She has very low self esteem and want's to desperatley get married no matter what. She's 37 and has never had her own place and lives with her parents, which are my grandma and grandpa. She has no kids. The problem is she picks or attracts the wrong guys who treat her bad. And doesn't care. She also has a problem with lying. The last guy she was with hit her in the eye and left a black bruise by her eye. She still wanted to marry him and would get very angry if we would tell her to leave him. In the end she ended up getting in trouble with the law, because she took a few of his checks and forged them. She ended up losing her job in the process. We asked her why she did it she said she needed to get revenge, then she told us that he told her to do it. We didn't know what to believe. In the end that relationship ended.

Now she told us she met this new guy and that he was going to marry her. So she drops everything including quitting her job to move to Albequerque, New mexico to be with him. Turns out he's calling her names and telling her he doesn't wan't her there. Also, Charging her rent to stay there. We can tell in her voice she wasn't happy being there. Then she told us she was comming back home because it wasn't working out. When she came home we tried to give her helpful advice. She blows up whenever someone tries to talk to her. Just flat out can be rude. So now she's looking for a job. It's been about 3 1/2 months and she hasn't found one. She expects for my grandparents to pay for her bills untill she can find a job a few miles away from home so nobody can know she is back. Meaning she told her last job she was going to get married so she doesn't wan't to run in to anybody in town. People already know she is back, especially the neighbors. So I don't know why she's trying to hide. And when she does run into people she tells them that her and her husband are relocating and that's why she's back. She's not with that guy anymore!!! And they never married. Why does she lie constantly. I don't think these guys wanna marry her, I think she makes it up. They never come down to meet her family, we don't even see them. Does she need help or what?
Re: Pretty Long!
Mar 30, 2007
You know she could simply have low self esteem and when someone is nice to her at the start or wants to have sex with her on the first date she mistakenly thinks this is love, but these guys are only using her b/c she is allowing herself to be used. I think she has far deeper issues than anyone in her family or on this board can help with.

Your aunt isnt the only one. A lot of people are desperate for love or attention and mistake the signs they are getting for real love. She definitely needs to break this cycle, but i doubt she will unless she faces the situation she is in, but to do this she would likely need to talk to a professional, but i highly doubt she will do that even. A lot of people like this prefer to live in denial.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:49 AM.

© 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!