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I Got Played
Apr 1, 2007
Not sure I'm looking for advice, I'm just kind of moaning and groaning away.

Okay. I'd broken up with my boyfriend about a month ago because I realized I was developing some seriously rockin' feelings for this male friend of mine, feelings that only multiplied once we started having sex and moved into the murky wasteland that is friends-with-benefits.

Now. The thing was, I really thought this guy liked me. He kept telling me that I needed to change my life and live up to my potential, and that I was basically a useless piece of crap because I did not work and depended on my boyfriend. (To Laylah, if you're reading this: you asked in another thread how I supported myself, and so that is the answer :) ) Actually I've only been depending on him for the past couple of months, because I used to have a lot of money squirrelled away from the last time I worked, many moons ago, but that all ran out, as money is wont to do.

Anyway, I started thinking that my friend was right, that I did need to have my independence. The main reason that I wanted to be independent was so that I could be with HIM. So I began the process of disentangling myself from my boyfriend, not an easy process by any means for a variety of reasons. Well, I'd made up my mind that I was going to find a job, and plan my future, and have this brilliant love affair with my friend. He made me want to change my life, and be better, and I thought, "How wonderful to have found him."

Weeeeeeeellll. I was feeling that way until a few days ago, when I found out from him that he thought I was going to try and latch onto him and make him my sugar daddy. I was like :confused: I protested, but he didn't believe me. Here's the thing - way back when I had first met him, before I even started to develop a crush on him, he was talking about much money he made and I made this joke about how I was going to make him my next boyfriend because he made so much money. Oh my god, I was completely joking!!! :dizzy: I barely even knew him then.

So while I've been walking around in this Love Fog over him for the past few weeks, thinking about how I adore everything about him, [I]he[/I] apparently just thinks I'm this stupid little gold-digger. I'm not a gold-digger. I was supporting myself until recently, and the only reason I was going to step back and let my boyfriend support me was because he really wanted to. The kind of money he pulls in, it would be a little redundant for me to work, too.

I never felt bad about that until my friend started getting on me about how I shouldn't be depending on anyone and how I should make my own way. Well, I guess I would have shrugged it all off except for the fact that I started to really like him. So I figured I would show him what I was capable of, start taking care of myself, and then be like "Ta-da! Look at me now!"

But now I am SO HUMILIATED that he thought I was trying to move in on him for his money! Oh my god! And then he actually came out and told me that we would never be a couple, and I'd better not entertain those kinds of thoughts. Who, me? :mad: I had THOUGHT the reason he was so persistent in convincing me to leave my boyfriend and get my own job was because he really liked me and wanted me to make myself available to him. Really, he made it sound like he really cared about me.

What I can't figure out is, if all he wanted from me was just to simply get me in bed, why does HE care what I'm doing with my life? That is what really ticks me off.

I was so flippin' angry at him that I reacted by going straight back to my old boyfriend. You know, I've complained about him a lot on here, mostly because he smokes weed, has crazy friends, and is missing a little bit upstairs himself, but I realized after this whole fiasco that HE actually cares about me. He'd do anything for me, give me anything, he's been there for me without fail all these years. Maybe I'm not in love with him, but I do love him, and how many people will I come across who devote their whole lives to making me happy? Here I thought I was falling in love with my friend, only to find out I was only getting used big time, and it really was devestating.

I'm mostly angry that he obviously thinks[I] so little [/I]of me, and yet that didn't stop him from jumping into bed with me. I can just imagine what he was thinking - "Silly little thing, she thinks she's going to blind me and get me to give her all my money, but I'm just going to get what I want and show her, muhahahaha." What a jerk. I don't know if I even want to consider him a friend anymore.

I really was willing to give up my whole lifestyle for this person. I really was starting to think that all of the money, the recognition, the parties - none of it could compare to being with someone who was so special to you. But now, I call BS. I'm not placing my bets on love EVER, EVER again. I'm going to stick with my [I]things[/I]. I feel so jaded and betrayed. It was like running down a hallway, feeling exhilarated, and then having a door fly open all of sudden and smack you right in the face.

I can't believe I let somebody make me feel embarrassed about something that, if I were not more modest, I could be rubbing gleefully into everybody's face. I'm not letting anybody else make me feel bad about myself, and I'm going to stick with the people who actually see gold in me, instead of a gold-digger :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

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