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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index


I endorse most of what Ava 31 is telling you: first of all, you need a focus in your life - find a goal that really appeals to you and go after it and don't give up before reaching it - stick to your projects, don't drop what you are doing just because you are afraid or bored, pick up your loose ends. If you find yourself to be less prepared than other people by comparison, don't get depressed. Certainly, there are things that you can do better than anyone else, because everyone is special with something. People often pretend they know a lot of things they actually ignore. Concentrate on your education. This is the time for it. If you don't do it now, you may regret it later. Read good books, to begin with. They can inspire you and chase away your depression.

Second, don't fall into the trap of thinking that your ex-bf is the only man in the world. Relationships are never easy, you know, people never show who they really are, but it seems to me that you are an honest person and if you don't betray your essence, you will eventually find the right people (bf, friends, etc). But don't let anyone take advantage of your own goodness. As for your cousin, you will have to forgive him somehow. This is not condoning, but probably he didn't know what he was doing, did he? You may need some counselling to deal with it, but don't create a pattern for your life.

Third, you are too young to keep thinking about death. Don't get me wrong, but I'd venture to say that maybe your mind is creatively idle. My advice is try to find an outlet for your worries, I mean, some kind of art: like writing, painting, drawing, music, cooking, knitting, something that you can create with your hands. Anyone can die at any time, at any age, but don't let this thought get you stuck in your life. Otherwise, look into your current habits of eating, sleeping, exercising, etc, and try to improve them so as to be healthier. Good health is vital for you to move on.

You don't mention your parents and family, so I don't know what kind of relationship you have with them.

Definitively you are not alone, but certainly there is a lot of things you can do for yourself. Listen to and learn from the old, even if you don't do exactly as they tell you to do. Cry if you feel like, but also develop your sense of humour. Laughing and smiling are really the best medicines out there.

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