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It's hard to give great advice since we are not there when she says some of these things, and tone can play a major role in situations like this. She could very possibly be a girl that likes to play games, that likes being desired and chased, or she could be a girl that is a bit clueless as to what she's saying. (I have a friend who doesn't think before she says most of the things she says, so she doesn't realize how it is taken by others around her. Stereotypical "dumb blonde" moments..)

If she is the type of girl that likes flirting with the intention of getting guys to lust after her, then I don't think she should be in a committed relationship. It's hurtful and disrespectful to you, as well as insensetive. Also, if she knowingly has a tendecny to get a little "loose" while drinking, then hopefully she will have the will to hold back while she is away camping. She will if she really cares about you and your relationship.

Everyone I know has some level of jealousy. It's normal. I think jealousy feeds on our insecurities. You say that you're ok looking, so naturally, if you see a guy you think is more attractive, you will be threatened by him and envious of any attention your girlfriend gives him, even if she's simply just talking to him as a friend. It's not easy coming to terms with the fact that your SO (significant other) has been with other people, especially if they are still friends.

I think the trick to overcoming jealousy is first recognizing it. Alot of the times our jealousy turns nothing into something.. just delusions our jealous imaginations plant in our brains! Once you feel that jealousy crawling into the pit of your stomach you can (try to) rationalize with yourself. Also, being realistic-- knowing and accepting that our SOs have a past, that they have been intimate with other people just as we have. A big key factor in overcoming jealousy is focusing on your strengths rather than your weaknesses. As i said, I believe jealousy grows from our own insecurities. So if you find yourself thinking, "man, there are such better looking guys here, why is she with me?" remind yourself that she [I]is[/I] with you.. because you offer something that other people haven't been able to; intelligence, humor, security... whatever it may be-- you have strong qualities.

If you truely don't trust her than that is a bigger problem than being jealous. Are you jealous because you don't trust her, or are you jealous just because you've been hurt in the past and you're unsure of yourself? If you don't trust her you need to ask yourself why. If you know the answer then you need to address that problem with her. If she really does intentionally flaunt herself infront of other guys, and purposely flirts with them; that tells me she shouldn't be in a serious relationship. A girl who is committed to a guy doesn't taunt other boys. Yes- it's nice to be desired and liked, but anyone who cares for one person and only wants to be with them won't parade themselves around as if available.

If the jealousy is a result of insecurities then you need to work those issues out with yourself, and learn to trust her. If she doesn't give you a reason to trust her, or show you that she can be trusted, then you need to re-evaluate the relationship and ask yourself if this is really the type of girl you want to be with.

Even though camping isn't your thing, I think it would be a good idea for you to go. Get to know her friends. Her friends are part of her life, and in a sense, now a part of yours. She doesn't have to split her time between you and them, she can combine you all, if you let her. If you can see how she interacts with her friends it may put your mind at ease.. or worse case scenario..it could show you that this isn't the girl for you. If she doesn't want you going then that is a red flag, warning you that she plans on having some fun that she doesn't want you to be a part of... and why wouldn't she want you to be a part of something that should be good, honest fun?? If she wants you to go.. I say go, interact with her and her friends and try to enjoy yourself.. you may be surprised.

Sorry for my lengthy response!!
Good luck!
It's irrelevant what her best friend thinks about anything. Maybe she shares your view, but that still doesn't mean that what your girlfriend speaking to other men was inherently inappropriate.

Getting along with a significant other's friends is important in any relationship. You don't have to love them, but you should at least make the effort, or else you end up in a very isolated relationship. What about your own friends? Does your girlfriend make an effort to get to know them? Why don't they come out on these outings with her friends?

You have created a no-win situation for this girl. You want to ask her but you don't want to know the truth. Why do you need to see what background someone is coming from? Either you enjoy spending time with this person, or you don't. What she's done in the past is already past.

Also, if you truly feel that you can't express what you feel to her without an argument, maybe it's time to move on.





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