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Ok so I just thought that I would tell everyone an update on what is going on.Today a mutual friend of ours comes by my house and she says my bf (ex) was showing her bf pictures of this girl on her page to her bf,and from the sou nds of it she has known for a little bit now.I can't believe he has beent alking to other people about her and I didn't even know.I kinda filled her in on everything that is going on,and besides a few of my close friends no one seems very shocked about this but me,and I don't mean shocked that this is his personality ,just not shocked that this is a problem that he is doing this.People that know him can't believe he would do this and they say since this is the first time that he has ever done anything like this in 11 yrs I should forgive him that everybody makes mistake and he hasn't actually met her or cheated.Well I do understand that people make mistakes and I can't say that Iw ouldn't ever forgive him but I am not okay with this,if I hadn't of been so sneaky and caught him doing this god knows where it could have leed.I am not staying in the house with him foreverything to jus t go back to normal in a few days,maybee after being separated and him proving to me over time and things change and improve it could be a possibility.It just really sucks my son has been asking quite often is were getting divorced we've explained were not married and have talks with him,he also asks if I would move out and who he would live with.I would really want him with me but I said it was up to him and he said he wants to live with both of us.I just tried to tell him not to worry about it right now,I didn't want him to be thinking about it to much and just let him know if he has more questions he can talk to us about it.Well that was this morning before we went to work.Two hours later my ex calls me and says he really got to him when our son was asking us all these questions and we had along talk and I understand now more where he was coming from but you still don't do this to someone you love,and I just really feel like I want this to work for us eventually but I kinda wonder even if he was able to change and prove himself if I will ever get over this or would it alwas be int he back of my head.I mean do people really change?It's like once your a cheater do they stay a cheater,or someone that seemed so into our relationship become a cheater?It's like even if he did change and become the most perfect guy I wonder if Iw ou ld always be doubting him and th at's a quick way to ruin a relationship.I feel so angry at him for ruining me and my son life,and I keept trying to give him the benefits of the doubt and time again he would keep e mailing her.This whole thing is so e mbarasing,after seeing the last e mail he sent her yesterday I broke down crying at work and and couldn't seem to stop all day so of course everyone is starring and asking questions and asking if I'm okay.during our conversation this morningwhen he told me our talk with our son had really gotten to him he has deleted his e mail and ******* acnt,I am glad he made the decision todo that but it is a little to late.And I'm sorry if this is confusing right now my mind is in a million places so if it's a little confusing I'm sorry!

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