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I've been talking to a man for a about a month and seeing him for about a week. Things were moving very fast. On the third day of seeing him, he introduced me to his friends..fourth day, his parents. He told me he liked me a lot and cutely asked me to be his 'girlfriend'. I spent the entire weekend with him. Now, 3 days later...nothing.

He does work insane hours and has always complained how he works too much, but come on...not even a 'hello, how are you doing?'. I've been the only one that has initiated contact with him these past two days over txt messaging...does he think that counts as sufficient contact? Am I being overly paranoid? The last time I talked to him on the phone 3 days ago, he said he'd call me that night, never did. I'm not going to call him anymore as I don't want to look desperate, but i'm really curious as to what is going thru his mind. Am I being paranoid? Should I call and ask him why? After how many days do you start questioning it?
Texting could very well be sufficient communication for him, especially with hectic work hours. Texting is probably much easier for his schedule. A lot of guys aren't "phone people." So until you say something to him he won't even realize its a problem for you.

I think my boyfriend would be totally fine if we never spoke on the phone again and just texted! haha.. In the beginning of our relationship I always felt like the one who did all the calling. That's changed now b/c he knows that I like that last phone call of the day.

You should casually mention it to him. Next time you do see or talk to him you should just ask "you're not a phone person are you?!" He'll most likely either say that he's not.. or he'll ask why you'd think so. That will give you the chance to say something about how you feel like the one always making the phone contact, that while texting is fine for quick convo or questions.. but a phone call would be better to say hello and good night. Tell him that you understand that he's busy at work, but that if he has time to send a text, then he has time for a 2 minute phone call to say hello.
I do get the impression he's not much of a phone person, but sometimes he'd call me before work to say have a good day or would text me...now there's nothing. Maybe since i've been the one to initiate first lately and he hasn't had the chance, but still...He does work 24 shifts at one of his jobs and 10 hr shifts at his other job but there is time in between. I just don't understand how he can't figure out how it would hurt my feelings. He's always saying he doesn't want someone who plays games so what is this? Maybe i'm being obsessive, I don't know. He does return my calls and txts, it's just the matter of getting him to initiate. I hate begging someone to call me. Should I take this as a hint to move on?
If it were me, since I was the one who initiated contact for the last three days, I'd just leave him be and go about the business of my life. The sad fact is, a lot of men play these games, They have fun for a few weeks or so, treat you like the most important thing in the world, then they say "ok, I'm done" and just disappear. Believe it or not, it happens every day. You're doing all the heavy lifting all of a sudden.

Even the busiest man in the world finds time to talk to a woman he is really into. If he is really into you, he's not going to want to make you feel blown off, and he's not going to want to lose you. If he's into you, he'll make the time to call you. I'd just let it be and see how long it takes for him to call me back.
Yes, I've had it happen to me quite often. The only reason this is bothering me so much is because he's a very serious and 'no games' type of person. He's told me numerous times he's not looking for the on-again-off again once a month relationships...that he's looking to settle down and takes his relationships very seriously. I don't know what I did...things seemed great this past week. Who knows, this is one thing I will never understand. I guess i'm a very upfront person and would appreciate knowing where I stand.
Jessica,

I would not call/text until he does. You need to give him the opportunity to miss you and think about you, which he can never do if you're always initiating contact.
[QUOTE=jessica129;3067915]Yes, I've had it happen to me quite often. The only reason this is bothering me so much is because he's a very serious and 'no games' type of person. He's told me numerous times he's not looking for the on-again-off again once a month relationships...that he's looking to settle down and takes his relationships very seriously. I don't know what I did...things seemed great this past week. Who knows, this is one thing I will never understand. I guess i'm a very upfront person and would appreciate knowing where I stand.[/QUOTE]

Well, give it another couple of days. If he doesn't call you by the weekend wanting to see you, then I'd say that spells it out where you stand.
I agree with the others on waiting a few more days, give him the chance to miss and call you. You don't want to come off as too eager.

but, you can only give him a certain amount of time before realizing maybe he's either not into, or just too busy for a relationship.

If you don't hear from him by Friday, without contacting him first, then I say let him go. You shouldn't have to wait around for any guy!!
I think I will wait...I've tried waiting to call others before but when they don't after a few days, i geniunely get curious as to what went wrong and so end up caving in. I've learned my lesson though, the less available you are, the more interested they seem to be. It's so hard to not cave in though. I really am curious as to what goes thru their minds throughout the day...doesn't even cross your mind I exist? It's too bad though, i liked this one : (
Yes it is a good idea to wait. Men are easily spoiled by things like that. You waft thru their heads when they are busy and they think "Oh, she'll be calling soon" and just take it for granted. Leave the next one to him, even if it does take a few days for the penny to drop. Ya gotta train these guys, and housebreak them. Cheers, Sera





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