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Relationship Health Message Board

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Well, first of all your boyfriend just sounds very immature. And yes, I think he's still thinking like a young, single, free male and not like someone who is in a commited relationship. It may take him several years to understand, if he ever does come to understand, that you don't say such things in front of your girlfriend. And by the way, there are no hard and fast rules about what guys do and don't do to each other. This other guy at work probably wanted the new girl to himself and that's why he got your boyfriend out of the running by making sure she knew your boyfriend had you. It was kind of idiotic for your boyfriend to tell you about hitting on some other girl and being stopped by this guy. That was very insensitive.

It sounds like you both are very young. I would say your energy in this relaionship would be better spent in thinking about what you want, what you expect, and what you are looking for in a significant other, rather than stifling your feelings, and asking "is this ok, is this what guys do?" There are some certain behaviors that men do, but for the most part, men are individuals,just like we are, and not all men are the same. You need to decide if you want to be with a guy who flirts with new girls at work and who get mad when someone mentions you in front of her. If you don't want to be with that kind of guy, then you can stop wasting your time with men who are wrong for you and go find a guy who will treat you better, who will be more devoted and loyal to you, and who will tell the new girl himself "yes, my girlfriend and I ate there last week, or yeah, my girlfriend wants to see that movie." As you get older you will learn that the trick to successful dating is to figure yourself out first, before you try to start figuring out men. Figure out yourself, and what you want, and don't waste time with men who can't or won't give it to you.

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