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Hi here is my update guys.

Okay, so I rang his bell. My heart was beating out of my chest. He was nice....didn't ask me in again....talked to me. I chickened out for a minute. He said...where you going, I told him I had 15 mins and I had to go to a meeting. He said something to me about calling someone and I used that as my opening....I said, yes, it would be nice if you called me once in a while. He said to me there you go...you are zining me. This was our opening. He said the altercation we had on Thurs. made him sick to his stomach. Actually he said the way I was made him sick to his stomach. I looked at him and was like OMG! He sai, no you didn't make me sick to my stomach....the whole scene made me sick. He said I upset him....and that I acted crazy and never saw anything like it. My God....what did I do? He said I told him he HAD to deal with it. I said I didn't say any such thing. I told him that I said we are getting to know each other and we don't know what either one of really likes or dislikes and that we need to have patience and learn. I know that is what I said, I am positive of it. He kissed me and said I like you and I think the world of you, you know that. You are this loveable sweet person and then when I saw that side of you I got scared it was crazy. I didn't throw anything, I didn't have a fit, I did however cry when he jumped at me and said I dont' have to do anything! (when I told him we need to have patience, we are getting to know each other). My stomach sank....he snapped. C'mon guys....in any relationship everyone has a moment. I mean for a guy he is very sensitive and I am sensitive to that because I am overly sensitive, but I can't watch every thing I do and say....that isn't being me. So I said look, I'm sorry but I thought we were friends before anything else. I thought we took the time to be friends first......and friends should be able to communicate with each other and say when something is wrong. Not just walk out or away. He said you're right.....we are friends and that means a lot. He said we can talk tomorrow, I don't want you to go to your meeting thinking about this. I said, I hope you don't hate me.....but I am not perfect nor have I ever claimed to be perfect. I lose patience, I have hormonal moments during PMS and I don't like the guessing games of whether you will walk away or ever call again. I also told him that he has a warped sense of humor sometimes and says things to me like "I always get the draws" (menaing panties) and I don't know how to take this???? He said I was correct about that. I also told him that I've always conducted myself like a lady.....and I don't like it when he says he has to tell someone....about being intimate. Then I told him that he mentioned he told his friend that lives nearby and when he was saying what he told him about us I was embarrassed and thought I could never look this guy in the face again! He said he was joking....I said I didn't know that and I've always conducted myself like a lady and what goes on between us is private. If you need to tell someone tell someone I will never see or meet........but not someone I know. He said again....you're right. He kissed me twice on my cheek. I rubbed my face on his......I bit his ear.....he stared at my butt and I said what are you looking at! :) He laughed. I don't know what is going to happen. He lacks patience for bumps in relationships, he really does and he doesn't want to deal with this. He told me it has been a long time since he had to go through this and he didn't like it. Of course, it has been 3 years since he was in a real kind of relatiionship. I do feel better, but he said to me at one point...I could never hate you....no matter what happens between us...which is what is sitting with me. He did kiss me goodbye.....I didn't see him this a.m. and I am not looking for him anymore. He told me he wants to call me when he wants to call......and he would like to come over when he feels he wants to come over. That is a guy thing.....he also said he doesn't want to be told when he should call. You know that sort of ****. Whatever guys, it is what it is. Thursday night was a bad night for sure, but he took it worse than I did. I am an overly sensitive person, but I would deal with bumps in the road..........I didn't curse at him, or wasn't really disrespectful in any way at all (not that I am aware of) so he picks on everything. So I have moments and I'm not perfect, but he isn't either. Nobody is. I am not taking all the blame here, I choose my battles.

If I were a liar, cheater or a deceitful person I would say, of course, walk away, spit me in the face whatever, but I am decent and caring and if the good outweighs the bad then talk about it. Maybe I think I lack patience for BS in my life too......also, I didn't say anything about my feeling he doesn't want to be seen with me.......I just thought that wasn't appropriate. Every woman out there has moments and I am not as bad as some I know that for sure. I feel calmer but I don't know what will happen if and when we speak. He said tonight but I don't know if he will be comfortable with it and I am not going after him or anyone ever again.

Friendof...you are a man.......what is you perspective on this?





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