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So by logging into my boyfriend's facebook, I found something very interesting...This past Thursday, he told me that he was going to his friend's house for burgers...so that's fine with me..so today I log into his facebook and the girl I've been talking about wrote on this other girls wall that they both know ---"Let's go outback tonight." then followed it up by saying "sorry, mike wrote that when i wasn't looking haha" ...so does that scream alone time over his house screwing around on the computer or am I jumping to conclusions? It could have been at the other friends house but his computer is upstairs and always off. I don't know how to call him out on it since I just invaded his privacy by logging into his account...I may ask him if he had any one on one time with her this week (which they must have been been thursday)..if he lies, I'm ending it..when someone lies once to me, it's as bad as cheating to me...How am I gonna call him out on this if I'm not definitely sure??
Sorry OP, but I have to say I'm agreeing with Willapp here; it seems to me like you're saying; "it's ok if he spends time with her behind my back and lies to me about it as long as he comes clean in the end". How is that ok? What happened to him not spending time alone with her in the first place? - Never mind lying to you about it!

The thing to remember about men, BoSoxEA, is this: - you need to start as you mean to go on, because the BS you take from them in a relationships earliest stages is the [I]exact same BS [/I]they're going to keep on feeding you till the day the relationship implodes as a result. The solution is simple - [I]DONT TAKE THE BS TO BEGIN WITH!!!!![/I]
Oh god, I've been there! The best part was always the turn around "ok, I lied but only because YOU would flip out." Well, YA!!!! You told him you didn't want him to do X. He promises he won't. Then he does X. Then he lies about X. Then he gets caught doing X. Does he appologize - hell no. Cos he hasn't done anything wrong according to him. And anyway, he ONLY lied because YOU would flip out. OH PLEASE!!! He lied because he was doing something he said he wouldn't. He lied in the hope that he wouldn't get caught. He lied because he wanted to hang out with some other girl more than he wanted to keep his word to you. Then he tried to deflect HIS bad behaviour onto you by laying the blame on you for "flipping out". It's BS. Total BS. He lied when he said he wouldn't hang out with her again. He lied when he said he was going for burgers and said she wasn't there. He lied when you asked him about it. And then he resorted to the old stand-by about being FORCED to lie, lie, lie when he got caught because YOU would flip out. Oh COME ON! That's so lame. He chose to make you a promise, he chose to break that promise and he chose to lie to you and hope he wouldn't get caught. Now he's acting like it's ok because you're mad? Of course you're mad - he knew you would be. How is that an excuse or a justification?? Wasn't the whole point of the heart to heart about him accepting that something makes you mad??? When he promised not to see her, wasn't the point so that you wouldn't get mad and upset?? The way for you to not to mad was for him to keep his word. He chose to lie instead. That was his CHOICE. Two things would keep you from being mad: (1) not lie, or (2) lie and hope he didn't get caught. His choice was to lie and hope he wouldn't get caught. He got caught. Now he says he lied because you would be mad otherwise. Well, he could have not lied and kept his promise because otherwise you'd be mad.

He seems to think "I promise not to see her" means "I'll keep seeing her but lie about it and when I get caught I'll blame you". The message he's sending is that when he makes a promise all it means is that he'll try harder not to get caught. Dump the liar. This is not about your behaviour or freaking out or whatever. This is about him breaking his promise, being a liar and then trying to blame you. HIS behaviour is the issue, not yours. He broke a promise and lied. You didn't. He chose to make a promise. He chose to break it. His word is worthless.

Only you can say if you're ok in a relationship without trust. But if you want trust, this isn't the guy for you.





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