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Well, to my mind, there's never a good reason to lie to someone you're trying to forge an honest and open relationship with. If the house was dirty or unfinished, then he should have told her the truth, instead of making up this cock and bull story about the ex. There's no excuse for being that devious.

This does sound very, very strange. If he had told me what he told you at first, I would have simply said "oh, I wouldn't feel uncomfortable. There's no reason why we can't go to your house just because she's there." and then I would have loved to have seen the tap dance he would have done then.

In short, he didn't want you feeling you could come over whenever. Who knows why, but at this point, who cares? If you're going to stay with him, I'd ask him flat out, I found out you lied to me about your girlfriend sharing the house. Nevermind how I found out, the point is, I know and I want to know why you lied to me. and if I didn't like his answer, I'd be gone, period.

I tend to be rather unforgiving about lying after the experiences I've had. I knew a guy who told his girlfriend that his ex girlfriend was coming to town, and his mom would be staying with him too, and though he was over the ex, she still had some feelings for him, and if she (current girlfriend)came around, it would just upset the ex and that would really upset his mom, so could current girlfriend just stay away for the 10 days ex and mom were visiting. And the current girlfriend bought it. I felt so so bad for her, because I knew that the truth was, he just didn't care all that much for current girlfriend, and cheated on her every chance he got, and ex girlfriend really wasn't so ex, and his mom wasn't even staying with him. He just wanted to be free to hang out with and have fun with and have sex with ex girlfriend without being bothered by current girlfriend. He put a trip on me "you're my friend, you can't tell her, c'mon, just don't tell her" and he was roommates with my boyfriend at the time who also put a trip on me "I gotta live with him, if you get invovled he'll just get pissed at me and make life miserable for me, it's not worth it, just mind your own business, etc." I didn't tell her, but when she came to me with tears in her big doe eyes begging me, "If you know he's up to something, you've got to tell me" I didn't tell her outright but I did say "well, I didn't see his mom the whole time ex was here, his friend had the spare bedroom, his sister had the fold out bed, so where did ex sleep?" We were also watching tv one time and the phone rang. They let the service pick it up, and then a minute later, his cell rang. She was going to answer it and he grabbed it from her saying "I don't like you answering my phone, you're rude to people when you're in a bad mood, I've heard you." This girl was one of the sweetest, kindest people you'd ever want to meet and didn't have a rude bone in her body. The fact was, he had other women calling him and didn't want her to find out. she was the laughing stock of all his friends and every time he told her he loved her, they all rolled their eyes.

I've been chastised on this site for suggesting or talking as though certain people are "evil." Well, while I do give most people the benefit of the doubt and wiggle room for being human, I do believe there are some people in this world who choose to walk on the darker side of human existence, and you could even say, yes, choose to walk with the devil. In varying degrees. This guy wasn't a murderer or a child molester, but he caused a tremendous amount of pain to not just this girl, but others as well. I do consider him to be evil. I didn't then, but I do now. I believe, more often than not, this kind of thing is what men are really up to when they're lying. We give them the benefit of the doubt far too much and far too often. For me, lying is pretty much a deal breaker.





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