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Relationship Health Message Board


Relationship Health Board Index


Thanks Nikki! Have a good weekend!
[B]HappyMom-[/B]
[B]Could it be his way of having spending money for different outings that you couldn't track with a credit card or bank statement? You can't track cash, and that is a pretty large sum to put in a can. And yes, his excuse was pretty lame.[/B]Yes, it was a lame excuse. My friend said that her hubby has a stash but he's told her about it. He says that he wants some money that he can buy her birthday, Christmas, Valentine's gifts, etc..because she keeps right on top of all of his charges & their check book. I wondered if this was what my husband was doing but he always just asks me not to look at the credit card statement for 2 weeks before Christmas & around my birthday.

[B]Whatever you do don't touch the $1500 stash. Keep checking on it and notice when money is missing and what he is doing around the time it disappears[/B] Well, after my husband lost his good job we used some of it. I actually bought a puppy with some of his money because I thought the breeder would take a check but she wouldn't. He teases me that I need to pay him back & I say I will someday. When we went on vacation I was so stressed out that I forgot to go to the bank to get some money so he went & took money out of his stash. He always says that he has to pay himself back but I don't know if he has. Monday while he's at work I will go count the money & keep a watch on it.
[B]
As for the not being sure of what was said or done, how about journaling? conversations, incidents, etc., write them down every day, that way he can't tell you "oh, that didn't happen' because it will be right where you wrote it down.[/B] Great idea LL's mom. I use to journal everyday. This was at the time when I was going through therapy about the problems I had with that male social worker. The journal's are long gone because when we moved out of state, I wanted a new chapter in my life & to move on from the pain this therapist caused me so we took them to the dump. I know for sure there were a few entries about Pam. One was about hubby going to the bar to have a beer with co-workers in honor of Pam's birthday. At that time, I wasn't suspicious of them having a thing. That's all I can remember in regard to writing about them. I probably didn't write about what he had been doing because I was going through my own thing then. I had filed a complaint with the state licensing board about what went on between me & the other therapists so I was probably blind to anything that may have been happening with Pam & my hubby. Now, of course, I wished I would have kept my journals so I could review them to look for more clues. I will start journaling today! Thanks so much for reminding me!

[B]Well, you could always say that you are going out of town and have your friend come to see you.[/B] My good friend really is going out of town so she wouldn't be here to help me. Also, her & her hubby's long weekend (4-5 day) trip may have turned into a 2 weekend thing. I don't know if I can leave my dogs home alone for that long. I can't take them with us because my friend wouldn't want them in her car. So I may just have to stay home, we'll see!





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