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Relationship Health Message Board

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In 1998 my now wife msged me on icq (doing a ramdom search) and we talked. After talking alot and things we became good friends. She did mention she was married and had kids. However the kids dad was gone alot. After she had some bad times with him she felt he was cheating again. As we did talk online (i was single and only worked) i noticed too he was gone. After a while I started real life serious relationship with someone and when things between that girl and me ended this online girl was there to help talk to me. Then in early 2000 the online girl and her hubby had broke up. I was in the meantime in a new relationship and it was going very bad. So this online girl and me "got together" with her kids here it was over a year after she had been broke up with her hubby and I was over my past girlfriends.

We talked and did everything together it was great. There was two problems however .. one I had gotten sick while at my other place and my body was breaking down (seizures. etc) and two I was no longer able to work. Which ment a long filing of getting disabilty. However this didnt take place till we were together till like a year after we were together when I got real bad.

After we were together a few years (we were married in 2003) .. i noticed she was messaging a guy whom she has had some intimate contact with. Well questioning her about it she claimed it was her friend and I had invaded her space (i didnt invade it I came to ask her a question and had sneaked behind her to scare her and when I did she quickly closed the screen but I had seen the name already). Keeping my mouth shut from further war I "spyed" on her and noticed they talked inappropriately which got me upset and caused me to feel "threatened" about her and I (but i kept my mouth shut). I noticed how she kept things "hidden". Things seem to quiet down and I still kept a eye on her as my trust with her was weak.

Well after a while I stopped spying and thought things in that area were ok. Then the other day while working on her computer fixing some errors in her office 2003 Onenote, I was making sure the data files were ok. It opened up a chat log she has been saving and it was with this guy.

Heres only a tiny bit of what it says in the middle of one of the chats (i ONLY changed the names).

Bill (8/27/2007 8:40:15 AM): LOL, Hey u could change the sheets....
Tess (8/27/2007 8:41:41 AM): rent a jacuzzi suite
Bill (8/27/2007 8:43:50 AM): I think I could get you wet enough... LOL.
Tess (8/27/2007 8:44:07 AM): ooo
Bill (8/27/2007 8:44:32 AM): lol....
Bill (8/27/2007 8:44:55 AM): U didn't use 2 get embarased... LOL.
Tess (8/27/2007 8:46:19 AM): not around you i didn't ... my own hubby wants me to do a strip tease for him and i won't do it..
Bill (8/27/2007 8:47:53 AM): What, u don't get horny ne more.... LOL
Tess (8/27/2007 8:49:48 AM): yea, just dont show it ... for you I will ... you need to change your name from gorgeous to sey)
Tess (8/27/2007 8:50:00 AM): thats sexy
Bill (8/27/2007 8:50:49 AM): Y.... LOL.

it goes on and on .. I got sick and have been a mess since. After reading alot of this stuff Im now finding out she told me has been lies I know personally her ex hubby is a butthead .. but im also finding out that my wife isnt a angel ether. What a real disappointment this has been after all these years to find out things. I just dont know what to do .. with the other issues going on in the house (her kids are austisic) and things I feel like ive only been here for a filler for helping with the kids. I dont even want to touch or kiss her. What do I do??

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