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Hi everyone,

I have always known I wanted to get married and start a family and wished to do so starting in my mid-to-late 20's, but my relationship from age 20-25 ended because he was not ready for commitment, and my current relationship (age 26-28) is great in many ways, but he's made clear he does not wish to propose until he's finished with grad school (maybe in about 2 years) and does not wish to start trying to start a family until after marriage (so approximately 2-3 years to even start trying, and that's if it all works out.)

Meanwhile, I've spent my life working my butt off to get through college, avoid debt, and have saved about a year's salary... all to be ready for my life's dreams. I feel I've done everything I could and am just very frustrated I have to be keep waiting...and waiting...per my partner's timeline. (i.e. I feel like I waited years and years for my ex to commit, but he never would. Now I have to wait for my current to be ready for marriage and children, too. I wish it wasn't always about what the man wants!)

I take full responsibilty for the boyfriends I've chosen. I just really need to vent. I know you can't make someone fit their life to your timeline... my bf wants to build a life with me when he's ready.

But it' tough to have to continue waiting... because first one boyfriend wasn't ready to commit...and then the next is, but not until HE feels the time is right.

I don't blame him, but it's so hard to keep waiting...

I am sad I will never been in a more ideal place financially to start a family (after my bf graduates, we will be moving. That means I'll lose my excellent health coverage at least for awhile, the job I love, some of my savings, and will be in a state of upheaval..not to mention entering my 30's and less fertile.)

I just wish things had worked out differently. I really WANT to move, but that will mean this stability will be gone for awhile. I never thought I'd be financially well-off, done with school, working, with great health insurance, ready for the next "phase" in life, ready to have a baby... and my partner would not be. I took for granted it would magically happen when I was ready, I guess. I feel like I've been waiting forever..working for it for so long.. and just have to keep waiting....

I'm not really looking for suggestions, more needing some understanding. I do not wish to do the "single mom" thing unless I end up with no other option... I just needed to express myself.

Hopefully it will work out wonderfully in the end.

Thanks for listening, guys!
[QUOTE=plasmodiumovale;3291118]Hi everyone,

I have always known I wanted to get married and start a family and wished to do so starting in my mid-to-late 20's, but my relationship from age 20-25 ended because he was not ready for commitment, and my current relationship (age 26-28) is great in many ways, but he's made clear he does not wish to propose until he's finished with grad school (maybe in about 2 years) and does not wish to start trying to start a family until after marriage (so approximately 2-3 years to even start trying, and that's if it all works out.)

Meanwhile, I've spent my life working my butt off to get through college, avoid debt, and have saved about a year's salary... all to be ready for my life's dreams. I feel I've done everything I could and am just very frustrated I have to be keep waiting...and waiting...per my partner's timeline. (i.e. I feel like I waited years and years for my ex to commit, but he never would. Now I have to wait for my current to be ready for marriage and children, too. I wish it wasn't always about what the man wants!)

I take full responsibilty for the boyfriends I've chosen. I just really need to vent. I know you can't make someone fit their life to your timeline... my bf wants to build a life with me when he's ready.

But it' tough to have to continue waiting... because first one boyfriend wasn't ready to commit...and then the next is, but not until HE feels the time is right.

I don't blame him, but it's so hard to keep waiting...

I am sad I will never been in a more ideal place financially to start a family (after my bf graduates, we will be moving. That means I'll lose my excellent health coverage at least for awhile, the job I love, some of my savings, and will be in a state of upheaval..not to mention entering my 30's and less fertile.)

I just wish things had worked out differently. I really WANT to move, but that will mean this stability will be gone for awhile. I never thought I'd be financially well-off, done with school, working, with great health insurance, ready for the next "phase" in life, ready to have a baby... and my partner would not be. I took for granted it would magically happen when I was ready, I guess. I feel like I've been waiting forever..working for it for so long.. and just have to keep waiting....

I'm not really looking for suggestions, more needing some understanding. I do not wish to do the "single mom" thing unless I end up with no other option... I just needed to express myself.

Hopefully it will work out wonderfully in the end.

Thanks for listening, guys![/QUOTE]

Sounds alot Like my Ex, girlfriend 3 years difference in age we dated for 6 years, and she always wanted to move out of west virginia, for some reason and wanted to start a family mid 20's, and get her life going. Well When she graduated College she told me she wanted to move here to Boston, i was like yes, she might be pretty serious about getting her career and life going, well we got engaged 3 months before she ended up moving here to Boston, Well we pushed for a job and we got her a nice teaching job as a aide, and she loved the job, But seemed like the relationship went downhill fast when we got engaged she did say yes, and she was 22 i was 25, she only tought for 4 months and had to move back to West Virginia, because the relationship was heading south after we got engaged, but for some reason she rushed into setting the date, putting our picture in the newspaper for engagement, and even bought a wedding dress, Maybe she got that reality check, we were still living with my parent,s to save, because its expensive here, but she wanted to rush into marriage and everything. I mean Wv, is no big city, So, it was tough, now its tough dealing with the break up..





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