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Relationship Health Message Board


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[QUOTE=Larrylou'smom;3330921]There's nothing at all with being wholesome. There are few people more goody goody than me. I don't drink at all, don't smoke, run from drugs like the plague, even pot, I'm 42 and still a virgin. But this is who I am, and yes I've taken a tremendous amount of kidding, teasing, razzing about it and people have tried to change me, get to "loosen up" etc. I am what works for me, what I am most comfortable with and what makes the most sense to me. Being with someone who can't appreciate who you are when you are being the you that YOU love the most, well, that person isn't worth being with anyway.

Keep your head up and keep searching until you find the right kind of men, men who will love, cherish and truly appreciate who you really are.[/QUOTE]

I'm still learning how to accept myself. I have a long way to go. I am even under the pressure of my parents to be more like a 'young person' I don't know they are always griping about why I dont go out and party all the time yet they will chastize me if I'm not doing well in school and 'getting it together'. It's like which is it?

I am an introvert and enjoy doing things like going to the mall, the library or just staying at home and relaxing. If I am at home my dad will walk past my room and make comments saying "why are you just staring at the tv like that? you must have a mental problem" for the longest he kept telling my mother that I was mentally ill because I am always at home in my room. I thought this was normal?? I don't stay in my room 24/7, but I will honestly admit the days that I am off from work or not in school, I really love to just crash in my room the whole day. When I work overtime, and have extra money I don't stay home at all. I am usually out at the mall buying things like makeup, clothes and getting my hair done. I am home more often when I am "broke". Still, my dad will claim that I don't do anything despite the fact that there has been many times where i have been gone the entire day from 12-11pm at night. i think he does this to irritate me

I did go through a social slump where there wasn't much for me to do but go to work and then go to school. I kinda lost touch with friends for awhile. I don't know why my parents, particularly my dad made this out to be such a tragedy. He really made me feel bad about myself. Like there is something wrong with being myself which is a bit introverted at times. He always talks about what he did when he was younger, saying how he used to go out every night. When he did this, it would give me great anxiety about my own youth. so I started going places everyday..to the museum, walking downtown by myself just trying to get out there more. this still did not satisfy him. because one day that i decided to stay home and rest he would complain about how i don't go anywhere even though i've been occupied with other things the entire week--work or school.

let's not even get on my love life. i was a "lesbian" for awhile because i didn't have a boyfriend. he started telling my mom that my ex best friend was my girlfriend and said that it wasn't normal for us to hang out so much. so you can clearly see why i am often confused and have anxiety about what i should be fulfiling in my life during my early 20s there is really no pleasing my parents. if i stay home too much then i am mentally ill, and if i go out with a friend all the time this person is my 'lover'.

i cannot wait until I gather enough money to move out so i can feel free to just be myself





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