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LarryLou'smom and xanadu2, I have done some thinking and I believe I have found the solution as to why you can't find a relationship or a good man.

1) You're too sane.
2) There are no good men. (Okay, a limited supply).

When I was eighteen, I happened to watch this movie, and the main character was someone that people absolutely fawned over, they just fell at his feet, even though he was selfish and insensitive and did whatever he wanted to do, whenever he felt like doing it. The whole thing really stuck with me and as odd as it may sound, he became my idol. That is how I live - I do what I want to do, I'm extremely selfish and self-involved, I cheat, I lie, I drink to excess, I live for the moment, chasing after whichever pleasure catches my attention in the moment. I'm a hapless party girl, have a roving eye and roving hands, proudly carry the reputation of a loose woman, trust no one, don't believe in love, and take nothing or no one truly seriously. And preversely, I have men falling at my feet wherever I go. I have men giving me money just because they say a girl like me shouldn't have to work.

And then here we have women like my homegirl LarryLou'smom and xanadu2, who are the complete opposite of myself - extremely intelligent, independent, put together, self-supporting, classy, funny, sane. And you ladies can't get a boyfriend to save your lives...well, I've done some thinking and come to the conclusion that men just don't want an intelligent, independent, put-together, self-supporting, classy, funny and sane woman.

It seems to me that most men are easily bored and just LOVE chaos and drama. One of my exes had an ex-girlfriend who was the axis of evil - she'd stabbed him once, and he was still in love with her. We were at a party in another state once, and she'd somehow tracked down the number of the party and called him. We were in the middle of making out, but he stopped and actually got on the phone with her and argued with her for a half hour while I sat there on the bed in disbelief. So after awhile I just got up and left the bedroom and made out with some strange guy in the hallway. And now that same ex wants to get back with me. Plus, the ex that I just recently broke up with wants to get back together with me too, and he tells me that he doesn't care if I sleep with other guys, as long as he can see me every once in awhile.

They say the squeaky wheel gets the grease; well the crazy girl also gets the guys. People like to be entertained. They like to be amazed and horrified. This is why movies and books are so popular. People want to be entertained, but in a guilty pleasure way.

Besides, I've already come to conclusion that love is not real, it is an illusion, a trick our minds play on us. So I'm not out there looking for Mr Right or Mr Perfect, I'm just out there to have a little bit of fun, and that takes the pressure off of everybody.

So I think if you have the trifecta of Crazy, Cynical and Scantily Dressed, then you're good. Not saying you should be like me, or that you'd even want anything to do with most of the guys I associate myself with.

[QUOTE]There are so many easy avenues for guys to get an 'easy lay' or to find Ms. Right, that if a girl doesn't appear warm & charming enough for him he'll easily pass her up and think nothing of it. [/QUOTE]

Eh, I don't know if I believe that. I'm not warm or charming, in fact most of the time I have the personality of a paperclip. As I said above it is the trifecta of Crazy, Cynical and Scantily Dressed that is your passport to success. The less interested I act in someone, the more interested they are in me. And vice versa.

Yeah, one day I'm going to get older and I won't be cute anymore, but I'll still be crazy and cynical, so two out of three ain't bad.
[QUOTE=GypsyArcher;3330001] I do what I want to do, I'm extremely selfish and self-involved, I cheat, I lie, I drink to excess, I live for the moment, chasing after whichever pleasure catches my attention in the moment. I'm a hapless party girl, have a roving eye and roving hands, proudly carry the reputation of a loose woman, trust no one, don't believe in love, and take nothing or no one truly seriously. And preversely, I have men falling at my feet wherever I go. I have men giving me money just because they say a girl like me shouldn't have to work.

And then here we have women like my homegirl LarryLou'smom and xanadu2, who are the complete opposite of myself - extremely intelligent, independent, put together, self-supporting, classy, funny, sane. And you ladies can't get a boyfriend to save your lives...well, I've done some thinking and come to the conclusion that men just don't want an intelligent, independent, put-together, self-supporting, classy, funny and sane woman.

It seems to me that most men are easily bored and just LOVE chaos and drama. One of my exes had an ex-girlfriend who was the axis of evil - she'd stabbed him once, and he was still in love with her. We were at a party in another state once, and she'd somehow tracked down the number of the party and called him. We were in the middle of making out, but he stopped and actually got on the phone with her and argued with her for a half hour while I sat there on the bed in disbelief. So after awhile I just got up and left the bedroom and made out with some strange guy in the hallway. And now that same ex wants to get back with me. Plus, the ex that I just recently broke up with wants to get back together with me too, and he tells me that he doesn't care if I sleep with other guys, as long as he can see me every once in awhile.

They say the squeaky wheel gets the grease; well the crazy girl also gets the guys.[/QUOTE]

Yeah but what sort of guys Gypsy?! To be honest I'd be in no way interested in being involved with the sort of men you're describing here. They sound like fools with lives like train wreaks who've no maturity or cop on whatsoever; in short Gypsy, and I'm not trying to be nasty here, but you're more than welcome to them, and I suspect you find them in such abundance because intelligent self-sufficient women wont have anything to do with them, which leaves a surplus of arseholes for those women who reckon arseholes are good enough for them.

I also think you have the personal potential for many more capabilities than you currently describe and I like to think that as you mature you will realise that for yourself and wave goodbye and good-riddance to the type of idiots you're entertaining at the moment.

You say you've: "come to the conclusion that men just don't want an intelligent, independent, put-together, self-supporting, classy, funny and sane woman". I'm happy to report you're very much mistaken in that conclusion. You are confusing men generally with arseholes of the male variety and assuming that they are one and the same; I'm sure the latter don't want intelligent and independent women, but I've had back to back relationships with men for seventeen years and I've been intelligent and independent every step of the way.





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