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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

Lots of birth control methods do have some noticable effects on sex drive, for sure. You can read up on it all over the place!

Personally... my drive was highest with my husband for roughly the first 1.5 - 2 years. Now it's slowly dwindled to about 2x a week. I'm about 5 months pregnant, so a little less now (I ache! can't say my extra padding particularly gets me in the mood these days either) but always at least once a week. He is a frequent complainer about it, but I can't really come up with by 2 - 3x a week is unacceptable, personally. It was only slightly more in our super busy newlywed phase ^_^ Granted I've never been a long-term high sex drive kinda girl, once the newness wears off I still enjoy the closeness but I don't crave it in the same way. I still feel it's necessary in our relationship, though, because it's something that he needs and is important for his emotional connection to *me*.

I think that... with your gf saying 'she loves you so much sex doesn't feel that necessary' is sort of ignoring your needs by feeling her own take precedence. Compromise is key and frankly sometimes when I'm not in the mood I'll force myself to find it or at least get started so I can get there, because in a relationship there's always give and take. My hubby needs sex to feel connected, if he goes a while without he feels.. a little distant? As long as he's working to do the things I need in a relationship from my partner (making me dinner once in a while, saying nice things, leaving notes and overall just making me feel appreciated) I feel it's only fair I do the same.

Maybe your gf should be reminded that a relationship takes two, and while she loves you so much sex may not matter to hear, that it's still an important part of a relationship for you :) Fair is fair, right??

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