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Relationship Health Message Board


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Hubby and I have been married for 5 1/2 years. I have always thought that we had a good relationship. Lately I find myself questioning that. Recently he took a new job. It's a great job, but required us to move out of state, required me to get a new job AND required us to be seperated for about 3 months, followed by being together for the holidays (along with his entire family that came to stay with us during the holidays) and about another month long seperation (I had to go away for training for my new job), then the morning after I returned home, his parents showed up to stay with us for a little over a month. His Mom is very high maintanence, requires almost your undivided attention 24-7 and never shuts up. By the time I returned home from training I was really ready for a little downtime, and time my dh. I would not say that his parents could not come stay with us, I just wanted them to come a few days later, but no one ever even told me what day they were coming to begin with. Then the whole time they are here, he caters to their every whim. He is a bit of a mommas boy and admits to it. During this time I am trying to get acclimated to living in a new place, a new job, and cater to his parents. As the month goes by I find myself getting angrier and angrier. I try to talk to him but it is like talking to a wall. I tell him I think we need a little time alone together and that I am doing my best but it is hard for me to get along with his Mom all the time. She takes a lot of little digs at me. He doesnt really respond. Then I go away for a week (for work) the whole time I'm gone, I'm bothered by this. So I write him a letter, explaining how I feel and that I really think we need a little time alone, and I deserve some respect. THe more I write the angrier I get. I realize that I am really really angry at him, for missed birthdays anniverseries etc etc......I find myself thinking about leaving. When I get back, I give him the letter and he reads it. He says he is sorry, he has a hard time saying NO to his parents. His eyes even water up a bit. Then.....nothing. He just continues catering to his parents. Then one day he tells me we are going away for 2 days. I am so excited...until I ask him what he told his parents. He lied to them and told them we were going to visit a friend out of town. I wanted to know why he could not just tell the truth, we need a little time together. No response. Now I am home with the flu and he is gone to work for a few days. I am really angry. I am sorry this is so long, I left out a lot of details but it's still long. Has anyone else experienced something like this. I feel like our relationship has changed, as he used to stand up to his mother but not anymore. Help.





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