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First off, I would like to apologize for the long post and thank you for taking the time to read.
My 5 year old daughter and I have made many changes in our lives the last few months that hopefully will be a positive start. We recently moved in with my bf that is absolutely wonderful to my daughter and me. This move is long pass due due to the fact that I was living with my exís mother. (My daughterís grandmother) for a period of time. After repeated attempts to get clean, my ex decided to go into rehab so we decided it would be best to move in with his mother. I really had no choice in the matter as he pretty much isolated me from my family and friends as I was deemed untrustworthy as a result of his paranoia. I was 17 at that time. Him 26.
Although he never fully recovered, my DD and I bounced back and forth as a result of low income and/or financial instability. During the time that I lived with his mother, I discovered that she was just as controlling as her son. Granted, I am very grateful and truly care for her.
While I did pay a decent amount of rent (As I have always worked full time) and did more then my share of cleaning and such, she had a habit of having to know everything that was going on in my life. (She still does) She would go through my dressers; trash can (even in the bathroom) and would listen to my telephone conversations. She is very controlling of my DD as well and I feel as though my daughter has suffered because of it. Let me give you some examples:
-Waking up in the middle of the night to find my DD asleep in her bed.
-Calling my baby sitter/day care several times a day to speak with my DD.
-Not correcting my DD when she accidentally calls her mom.
-Taking my DD without telling me.(Got out of the shower to find they went to the grocery store)
-Telling me that Iím a monster for making my DD stand in the corner because she would not eat her dinner. Instead she went into the fridge and got her what she wanted, whipped Cream.
-Teaching my DD to disobey my rules and/or comfort her while throwing a tantrum for not listening.
-Sheís friends with a helper at my DDís school and contacts her when my DD gets sick. Actually, a couple of weeks ago, I picked my DD up from the nurseís office to see that her Nana was waiting in the lobby.
-Demanding two nights of visitation a week.
-Sheís gets very jealous when my DD goes to stay with her grandfather for a night. Ect
We have augured several times as I do not put up with this kind of behavior and feel as though she is over stepping her boundaries as a grandparent to no avail. She says that Iím being immature and over reacting. I tried to keep them separated as much as possible. She did not baby sit for me. All in all, my daughter tells me that Iím a child and I have to listen to Nan Na because sheís the adult. My daughter cried and begged for me to let Nan Na go to the ĎMothers Day Teaí at school instead of me. (This was yesterday)
Now that we are all moved out, I figured that weight would be lifted. Instead Iím getting roughly 5 e-mails from her per day as well as about 2-3 calls per day to talk to my DD. My bf is getting worried as he feels as though she is becoming obsessive and is not satisfied with any length of time that I allow her to see my daughter.

Please give me your honest opinion on how I should handle this. Iíve told her that I think itís best for my DD to stay home for a WHOLE WEEKEND as she is adjusting to her new schedule and she flipped. Granted, she is a lonely woman who has not dated since her divorce (30 years ago) has no friends and is on antidepressant but, does that mean that I have to split half of my time with my DD with her?

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