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Hi,

I always lurk these boards, but now I have a problem in my own relationship and I need some advice/feedback, or maybe even just a fresh voice... because I am confused!!

Anyway, I will try to make this post as short as possible, without skimping on any important information.

My girlfriend and I have been going out for 4 years now - she is 22, and I'm 24. We've been living together for about a year now. Things have generally been good throughout - every relationship has it's up and downs. But it seems that we are in a hole now and can't get out of it!

It seems like she gets hurt easily by me. In the first year I cheated on her (she cheated on me too), but since then we've been 100% committed to eachother. I don't think she's ever really got over that and I think she feels like I will do it again.. Since then we've had some rocky patches where she feels like I am "disconnected", and she doesn't trust that I am there for her. I think she feels like she puts more into the relationship than I do, and she's starting to really resent me for it. I'm really not an emotional guy, but believe me I have been trying to hear her out and I'm really trying to make things work.

Occasionally I will slip up (and become "disconnected" - usually just lost in my own world) and she gets hurt really bad. Usually I will reassure her that I am there for her and I want her, etc. But this time she doesn't seem like she is going to come out of the funk. It's really hard to get engaged in the relationship when I don't feel like she trusts me, but I am trying..

Yesterday I put on a brave face when I picked her up from work and I was trying to make the best of things, and then she grills me for not "feeling" the problems we have. It feels like she has no confidence in me anymore, and that is a very bad feeling...

Ahh, I want to type soo much but I don't know if I can ever explain the whole situation... well I guess it feels good to rant a bit...

Its just really hard to see her go through life with a blank stare on her face.. almost as if she is numb.. And I don't know what to do!! I made her a card last night because I don't know what else to do.. and she just kind of looked at it and then went to the computer to talk to people on MSN..

Mr. Confused.





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