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Relationship Health Message Board

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I have an abusive ex who tried to contact me about a year after we quit speaking. Do you want to know what I did about it? Nothing. I didn't write him back, I changed my email address, and I never heard from him again. It's been about 5 years since that happened. Thankfully he got the message.

I don't understand why you feel compelled to reply to him at all. You said yourself that you know he hasn't changed, and he has still been abusive toward you as recently as December. That, to me, would mean that he's not worth your time or effort to ever speak to again? So, what's keeping you from cutting him out of your life, as you should have when you first broke up with him?

It sounds like you have enough of your own problems in your life, between your son's father and your panic attacks, you really don't need this ex of yours in your life making things even more complicated.

I think you should just stop communicating. There's no point? Why be friends with someone who abused you? It doesn't even make logical sense. He had his chance to treat you with respect and be nice to you once, back when you were dating. But he couldn't even do that much. Now you were nice enough to talk to him again, and he still treated you as badly as before. There's no point in continuing this communication with him, now. He has proven himself totally unworthy of your time and effort. Cut him off and don't ever speak to him again. Don't ever let a man treat you that way again, because it's up to you how much you are willing to put up with in your life. And you were very smart to break up with him. So, follow through and cut him out of your life completely.

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