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Relationship Health Message Board

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To me, cheating is cheating, and that's what she did. I'm confused about the whole part of her saying she just got out of a relationship with a married man? Did she have an affair with that guy? That part confuses me. Regardless of that, what she did was wrong, whether or not she had sex with any of them, she still went behind your back and deceived you. And I agree that her claiming she will kill herself is total manipulation. It makes me sick to even read that because I HATE people who do that too. I had an ex years ago who did that and actually made me think he did. In fact, it was for the EXACT same reason you have. I was out of state to go see my family and the night I left, he was online trying to hook up with girls, something he was no stranger too. I caught him, called him and broke up with immediately, and he started to pretend he was going to kill himself. He said he was going to, hung up the phone, and I couldn't get a hold of him for hours. I had to call his mother to go over to MY apartment (where he was) and check on him. Needless to say, he didn't do it. It was all a part of his manipulation to try and get me to stay with him. They do it to scare/guilt you into staying. And really, who wants a relationship like that? She's the one that messed up, not you, and she can deal with the consequences. I'm surprised that you have been together for 18 years, she is obviously a grown woman. At least my ex who did it was 19 and immature, although there is no excuse for that type of manipulation.

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