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OK so this is what happend. I lived with an old friend and his girlfriend for around 9 months this last year. On the whole this friend is not the greatest of friends. Actually I dont consider him a friend it was just a person I used to be friends with and I needed a person to live with. He talks alot of crap about people and is very disrespectful and has no self-respect either. Anyhow we all lived together and he had a job were he was gone two weeks at a time. Me and his girlfriend ended up getting drunk one night and fooling around. The girl is extremely gourgeous and I made a mistake. I told her that it was a mistake but she is crazy. She cheats on him all the time, doesnt help pay for anything, would not clean after herself, and tried and tried and tried to get me to do more stuff with her. She would do a lot of weird manipulative stuff to try to get me to do things with her or even just to talk to her. She wanted me to go out on dates and she invited me to her bedroom a couple of times. She stalked me as well. Left me messages on my phone, followed me out to bar, and caleld me from blocked numbers. The living situation was an utter nightmare and for most of the time I was elsewhere with friends and other girlfriends. My friend was aware of the cheating, yet he would not breakup, I was there when they were haveing the conversation. He basically does anything he can to keep her around, like buys her cars, motercycles and junk. SO I basically had to deal with that crap for the whole time living there. She never brought over guys but I had to listen to her talk on the phone and she would come in and out of the house at 2:00 in the am all the time. Anyhow. I am glad that this is all over with. BUT

The problem is he is friends with a lot of people I know and he started makeing these rumors about me being gay and telling people all this stuff about me that isnt true. My other friends started giving me crap and also the girl said that I came onto her all the time when we lived together. So I got furious and wrote my old friend an Email about all the stuff and sent it to a couple other friends whom are mutual. I told him to stop makeing the slandering comments about me and how his girlfriend cheated on him all the time. I confessed to makeing out with her, but I also told him how she litterally stalked me. Called me from blocked numbers, followed me out to a bar, left me sex messages on my phone. So he replied to me saying that she doesnt cheat and that he knew that I was trying to get with her, and he didnt believe me makeing out with her, and denied all the slandering comments. He also said that I was just trying to break them up because I wanted to get with her. I couldnt beleive that and I havent replied back.

So I dont know what to do because my other friends will hang out with the two of them and I know they are just saying more things about me that are false so that they can pretend that there relationship is normal. I have considered dropping all the friends that associate with the two of them just because I don't want to be a part of the lies especially the ones directed at me. A couple of them that hang out with them are good friends of mine but they dont seem to beleive me when I tell them about all the stuff that happend. I think it is because they have a lot of money and the girl is really pretty so everyone she tends to beleive them. Should I just give up and not hang out with any of them? My other freinds still contact me but they dont believe me about the stuff that happend and I dont want to just give in to the lies the guy I lived with said to me to keep things in balance for them.

Like I would almost rather never hang out with any of them than have to feel the burden of being pigeonholed into a person that I am not.
SO should I just forget about all of these friends. Obiously the guy I lived with is not my friend and I do not care about him anyway, it is just the mutual ones.

So what do I do?
I think I would write off the two of them for sure. Like, don't ever talk to them again because they are obviously a couple of drama mama's. Pretend like they don't even exist anymore. Good thing you don't live with them anymore!

As to your mutual friends, the ones whom they are poisoning with their lies, I propose a different track. I would just tell them straight up, Hey Pete (Joe, Larry, whatever), you've known me a long time and you know who I am and what I'm about. I'm sorry that John and Melissa (whever their names are) are dragging you into the middle of their drama, but I'm just letting you know that I'm done with them and have no further use for them in my life. I'd like to still be friends with you if that's possible, but if not, then you need to let me know and we'll part ways here.

And if they hassle you or say anything bad about you, tell them thanks for their time but you're done with being treated this way, and have a nice life.

Unfortunately there are times when we have to start cutting people out of our lives, people who we considered friends, for various reasons. It happens and there's nothing we can do about it except hopefully learn from it. But my advice is that you should never keep people in your life who treat you badly. They are not worth your time or effort if they can't treat you with respect.

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