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Relationship Health Message Board

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I really feel for you with what you are going through, I don't even know how to advise you because our situations are so different. My husband is a very nice person and we will be very good to me and do whats best for the kids! I do have children boy 11, girl 7 and my baby boy is 4. I do worry about the struggles that they will go through with the divorce process, they love their father very much but I can't live a lie with my husband any longer. I'm planning on getting a divorce in Feb. or Mar, we're going to counseling so that we can get everything out on the table and end the marriage in the best possible way. My boyfriend is planning on getting a divorce at the same time and we will marry in a year or two, I need time to myself to get to know me again as a person without being married. I do love him so much, I didn't think I could feel or love like this and I can tell from what you write that you feel the same way that's why my heart hurts for you! I know what you're going through and I'm so sorry. You need to look into getting a job where your services are always needed like Health Insurance, Nursing, some type of sales. I am an Insurance Agent and make really good money and have good benefits and all I had to do was get my license which wasn't hard at all.
I wish you luck and will continue to check in to see how you're doing!

Well its fortunate for you your husband is willing to be civil. Mine is not. He said he wanted to take the kids from me to get back at me for the affair I had. And since the custody evaluator agreed it was cut and dried. Apparently where I live the judge almost always goes with the eval. recomendation. I would have lost my kids and house. There is no way out for me unless I give up my kids which I am not going to do.
I do envy you that you will get to be with the person you love. I dont think I will ever be able to do that. It may be hard for people here to understnad unless they know what has gone on for the past year and a half. Some think that its so easy to just get a lawyer and blah blah blah. Believe me I have done all that. It was over, there was no other way. I went through all the right, domestic violence, monetary help, etc ect. It only went downhill and my lawyer and my bf all knew where we were headed. For some people there isnt an easy route to take. Yes they are always hard but you have to have hope as some of you here have had. I cant live without my kids, and at this point in time without a job. Sometimes things dont work out the way we hope.
I appreciate your kind words and wish you all the best in your life. I know I have lost my bf forever and the life I so wanted with him and my kids. Sometimes life sucks and hurts. Maybe thats why there is so much mental health problems and suicide in this world. :(

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