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Relationship Health Message Board

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I met one guy through a mutual friend. We kissed the second day we met, then he's been busy with his family for Christmas, obviously, and I was all upset about it and feeling rejected by him even though I've known him maybe a week. Then last night I met this beautiful man and we ended up kissing and talking about all this philosophical stuff and would look at him and feel in love, like I'd fallen in love overnight. Then he mentioned he has a girlfriend and he just wanted a one night um "expansion of his horizons." Instead of just being rational and thinking, you know, "I met this beautiful man but it was just one night of fun and he's taken," I've literally been depressed about it all day, I humiliated myself in front of him , the other guy I kissed, and this other guy from my past by telling them way too much too soon and now none of them will probably ever talk to me again. I feel really unstable right now and every rejection, real or imagined, I take so personally that I just want to curl up and die. I was genuinely upset that this guy wouldn't leave me for his girlfriend even though I met him THAT NIGHT. Then I had the nerve to TELL HIM this, so clearly, he'll never speak to me again. I rarely meet people I find attractive AND interesting AND intelligent, so when I do I try to force it and I get so devastated after literally meeting them for 3 hours. What's WRONG with me??? I sound like a total nut I think and I'm scaring myself and others away. I'm sort of like that with my friends too, constantly overanalyzing everything and they're sick of it too. My phone hasn't been ringing much lately and I feel like such a lonely soul. This is intense, I apologize, I just don't know what to do and everyone I talk to in my actual life is apparently very burdened by my talking about it. Please don't just tell me to take medication, I think that's such a cop-out and shallow.

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