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Relationship Health Message Board


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I've been with my guy for two years, but have only lived with him for one. I've learned that he is an unaffectionate, uncaring person. I blame these traits on his horrible, abusive, upbringing. I love him, but these two traits about him can be very hurtful to me. For example, I had a colposcopy done today (due to abnormal cells in my cervix). I went home afterwards and called to tell him about it. He didn't know I had an appointment, so I told him how they saw two spots of concern in my cervix and took tissue samples to run tests. His response "Sweet". I didn't respond. Then he said "So what's the problem". I just said nothing, I just don't feel that great. Then it was dropped. So he just came home and I'm on the computer and within two seconds of being in the room with me, he says "Why are you moping around?" I said I'm not. "Well you seem angry, you're giving off an angry vibe". I said "well I just had tissue torn from my cervix, so no I'm not excited". "Well I don't have a cervix so I wouldn't know what that feels like". I said, "well not good". Then he goes on to talk about himself, and his day, and his job. I don't act very interested or enthused so he leaves in a huff and puff b/c I'm not in a good mood.

I've been dealing with this type of behavior our entire relationship so I'm almost numb to it. I blame myself for not expecting this reaction and getting upset. But I question if he is the right guy based on this and other uncaring things he has done in the past. Little things like parking in the garage which leaves me to park in the street in winter, taking my ice scraper b/c he doesn't have one, not giving me any back rubs when I constantly request them after giving him one, making dinner evey night and doing tons of chores around the house, etc. I just feel stupid for staying with him but I care for him and love him as a person so I give up receiving these things for him. What do you make of this? Help please.





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