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Re: Arguing
Feb 12, 2009
[QUOTE=rosequartz;3881701]are you SURE you over-reacted?
sometimes guys say this to deflect the blame back to you......maybe you had a good reason to react! what makes it OVER-reacting.....
what started it?[/QUOTE]

well last year he got a new job. he employed this girl. she turned out to be a really passionate hard worker when it came to her job. work built up and he asked her to stay back late on some occasions. in return he used to drive her home which made me uncomfortable as i had never met this person. one day i went into the office to meet him after work. things got delayed as something came up at work. i waited around. after they had finished we went downstairs for a smoke before leaving. she didnt make any coversation with me. my boyfriend and i were going on a date and all she wanted was a smoke and was talking to him about work and not even talking to me. he said i could make the effort too.

anyway, due to the financial crisis, they both lost their jobs. since then they have been keeping in contact. he hadnt spoken to her in about a month and then she messaged him out of the blue last week asking to meet up. she then called him the next day twice. he didnt even tell me they met up. he said he forgot to tell me. apparently it was because she found out about a senimar to do with the industry they work in. she wanted to talk to him about it. he also spoke to her about a job he is starting soon. a few months ago, he asked her to come and drop some software off at his place from work as he took the day off. he lives with his parents. she was in his room with him because thats where his computer is. he had the door open and his mum was there too. he told me she came round to drop the software off but he never told him she was invited in for coffee in his room while he was installing the software. this made me uncomfortable. his mum told me she came in. his mum also thinks she is a snob and doesnt like her either. his mum thinks she is a player.

anyway, they went to the senimar about software thats used in their industry. i dreaded the thought of her hanging around him. he said i have nothing to worry about but he wants to start his own business and sees her as a hardworker. he talks to her about her personal problems and even said that i and her could become good friends. i dont know why he talks to her like this but i havent even met her properly and its been nearly a year since she started working for him at his previous job. they even gave each other birthday presents last year. she was only new to the company and as he was her boss most likely wanted to make an impression so he returned the favour. he says she is just a friend that could be good for his business. he even said i can help out in his business. having said all this, we are planning on moving out this year and we are about to go on out 3rd interstate trip. he plans his whole life with me and we hang out all the time and talk everyday. do you think im just overreacting and being a bit jealous? apparently she has a boyfriend too.

also, we are 10 years apart. im 23. he asked his mum about this and his mum thinks its because of my age, his mum likes me but sees that he gives me too much advice and he should be with a women equivalent to his age group and who is intellectually challenging. i found this a bit offensive because i consider myself to be smart person. im going to university right now. i havent had as much life experience as him but that doesnt make me dumb. what do you think?

the reason why i got my back up about this work colleague was because his mum said a few things about her. his mum doesnt like her either and said she would kick her out if she came over. if his mum doesnt like her, then why does she say this stuff about me? its weird

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