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Relationship Health Message Board


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[QUOTE=mygirltuesday;3905708].
But as I've said before, things have improved dramatically....though none of you seem to care about that.

Why give up so easily? Isn't there something to be said for sticking by someone who needs your help? This isn't my first relationship. And I wasn't born yesterday. I firmly believe in this, in us, and I appreciate the advice from everyone on this board (truly, I do) but I'm taking it with a grain of salt. Because I'm the only one that knows the truth about this situation, you know?[/QUOTE]
You are doing what just about every abused woman does - downplay, downplay, downplay. Whatever motivated you to write and put it out there is still happening. If he is improving so dramatically, then why are you still concerned enough to post here? I think that inside of you you know how wrong this is and how much at risk you are. You are the woman who calls the police when he bashes you, then will not follow through. The advice about leaving til he improves is good, but you said yourself that you have no intention of ending the relationship. This will be obvious when you have delivered this ultimatum a couple of times, then gone back. All you will be doing different is depriving him of your company until he gets over it. To make this work, you must be prepared to lose the relationship unless he undertakes to get anger management therapy or couples counselling or similar. Once he realises that your resistance means nothing more than not answering your phone for a few days, bang goes that strategy. I get that you are unhappy at the feedback that you are getting here, but don't for one minute think that your case is different than any other abusive relationship. The people here have seen it all, and your chap is a pretty archetypical angry abuser. Write again when you need advice on how to deal with your next generation of abusive men and downtrodden, denying women - ie your son who will yell at his partner, and your daughter who will suck up abuse just like mommy does. Sera.





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