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Relationship Health Message Board

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If my BF is anything like me, I know he'll just dig in his heels and say "no" whenever anyone tells him to do anything. Or (if he is unlike me), he will ignore them, thinking if he ignores long enough, the nagging will go away. So me encouraging him to find his purpose in life may be interpreted by him as me nagging and he will just ignore that too.

Trust me...I love when I meet someone who has a more broad view of life. I can talk for hours to my best friend, and I love that he is somewhat ambitious, has work ethic, and is a bit of a deviant like myself. And was I not already dating when I met my best friend, I would be dating him now. I think when I fall for other guys, it's because they are what I want in a man plus they have traits I find attractive that my BF does not good conversational skills, ambitions, confidence, and so on.

I sometimes can't explain why I am attracted to him. He is definitely a sweet guy, and he has a good sense of humor. This isn't really a deciding factor, but he's great in the bedroom too. And he treats me well and he's a very loving guy. But I know as well as anyone else that love doesn't pay the bills. And when his parents die, he won't have anywhere to go where he can mooch, so hopefully he can find where the nearest homeless shelter is...since that's where he'll be living unless he finds work someday.

Maybe he is Mr. Right, or maybe he's just Mr. Right Now. I still want to give him a chance to redeem himself, but I won't be too happy if he makes zero effort to find a job when it reaches a point where he needs to help pay the rent. If things get horribly bad, I may threaten to leave him...though that is sort of the passive-aggressive way out.

I know we have a big conversation in store for the future, and it's the one where we try to compromise on the major issues we disagree on...that's gonna be fun. I'm almost looking forward to it because it will mean actual interaction with him. And no, DBF knows he doesn't talk much to me because he always apologizes for not saying more than one word an hour to me. I try not to hold it against him, but man he's boring.

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