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Relationship Health Message Board


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Thanks so much for everyone's input. I dont want to waste my time in a relationship that only makes me feel bad. I am not/nor have i ever been the girlfriend who is suspicious, jealous, and untrusting. I had never gone through anyone's stuff before, but i really felt insecure about this guy. I dont want to continue to worry and look over my shoulder. This is not the person i am or want to be. So, is the consensus that he is in the wrong, i am in the right to worry about his loyalty, and i should get out before i get deeper into his web of lies? I have given up a lot for him, a baby no less. I am still relatively young, so i can meet another, and still have a family that i want, right? Just need a little pep talk to be sure that this guy is so so wrong for me.
[QUOTE=Dark Stranger;3991285]Ehh, I'd give the guy the benefit of the doubt. I've told friends who are of the opposite sex that I love them...I didn't mean it in the same way as when I say it to my significant other. You can love a friend, can you not?

And yeah, I'd be mad about someone going through my phone too, so you did kind of violate his trust, and now he will be even less likely to tell you anything. So...that might be bad. I think that's along the same lines as picking up the phone and listening to someone's conversation and, really, I don't think every aspect of your partner's life has to be public or approved by you.

If it's an issue or you suspect cheating or something fishy going on, talk to him about it. But don't go through his phone like a nosy parent looking for juicy secrets in their teen's diary.[/QUOTE]

yeah , i understand, cause i have been on the receiving end of this. I have friends that tell me they love me...but it happens maybe once every few months, and I dont talk to them often at all, and its usually when they are drunk. I also do not say it back the same way... ever. I may say: "i love you man", or "love you too. how are you?" basically much more casual.
I have also been spied on, had a boyfriend go through all my stuff etc... that is why i am not that way.
Guess, this guy is just not for me. I am sure there are lots of people that can overlook all this stuff, but i am tired of living in tension. Time for me to let him go.
Its really hard.





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