It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

Not more than 1 hour ago I was told by a friend that my girlfriend of a little over a year and a half has been coming on to several people we work with. I work with both my girlfriend and friend at a part time job. I'm 22, she's 19.

So my friend was at my house and he started telling me I needed to know some things about my girlfriend. Once he started talking I knew what he was getting at, and I told him I already knew about everything.

A few months ago a guy we use to work with asked my girlfriend out knowing she was in a relationship with me. After turning him down he still wouldn't leave her alone and kept asking her out and asking her to hang out with him. Of course I didn't like this and told her how I felt about it. Eventually things died down and I felt comfortable with them hanging out on occasion. But it was only ever the guy that asked my girlfriend to go to Starbucks or whatnot. She never ever asked him to hang out and anytime she was going to be with him she would tell me about it then ask if i was okay with it. Since I'm a trusting person of her and not a jealous person I was fine with it about 90% of the time. Eventually he said he couldn't stand being just friends with her and stopped talking to her for a while.

After that happened another guy at work started asking her to hang out and grabbed her in an uncomfortable way at work one day (from what my gf told me it was him trying to give her a hug that was too boyfriend like and she told him to get off her). After the "hug" he started asking her to hang out and one day even asked if he could pick her up from school and take her somewhere. Again I wasn't happy with this and from what she told me she was pretty grossed out by it. This didn't go on for more than a couple weeks.

Then on a third occasion another guy at work sent her a text message saying he had feelings for her and want to try and start a relationship with her. Mind you this guy is married and has three kids and at least 15 years older than her. This being a guy that she and I both respect we were kind of surprised by it, and she sent him a message back saying she's in a relationship plus he's married and has kids. (if you can't tell we work at one screwed up place).

Now all three of these people knew she was in a relationship with me, and my girlfriend told me about all three guys almost as soon as they happened. We're very trusting with each other, and because she told me and was honest with me I didn't get upset with her. Also none of the three people know that I know about any of it at all.

However, after believing this for the last 6 months my friend comes over tonight and now has me questioning things. According to him with the first guy my girlfriend was leading him on. I can sort of see this because the first guy isn't really popular with the ladies and has never had a girlfriend. So its possible any prolonged interaction with a girl can be seen as a come on to him. And apparently the second guy started coming onto my girlfriend only after he received a text from her saying "I want to f*** your brains out". Then I was told the third guy came on to my girlfriend because my girlfriend said she thought he looked good and said some other things that made him believe she was interested in him.

My friend pretty much said that everything I knew about was the opposite of what really happened. And that he was certain something was happening with her, he just wished he had solid proof. And to make things even more complicated my friend told me that there are 5 people that think I need to be told how my girlfriend really acts when im not around. However these 5 people are all friends with each other and hang out all the time, three of them are the guys that came on to her. My friend told me that at one point they wanted to do a group discussion with me but my friend told them that wouldn't be the way to do it.

Being super confused now I got a hold of someone else we work with that isn't in that group of friends and she said she hasn't noticed anything weird, but then again she's not very close with my gf.

By now you're probably wondering why I dont' just go talk to my gf about it. The reason I haven't is because she's out of the country until July 16th and doesn't have 24 hour access to a phone or computer. So right now I'm worried sick to my stomach wondering if everything she told me was a lie or if i wasn't getting the whole story. My friend seems certain something fishy was going on, but I also trust my girlfriend more than anyone. And she isn't the kind of person to cheat on someone, if she were to cheat on someone she would just break up with her boyfriend before doing anything.

So what I'm thinking of doing is going to guy number three, the married one and talking to him about it. Even though I know he sent those messages to my girlfriend I still trust him and respect him in a way. Last night he was the one that told my friend someone needs to tell me about what shes been doing. I was thinking of just asking him what he thought of her and what he thinks of her and I being together. Kind of beating around the bush to see what comes up.

I realize it may be kind of hard to give an opinion of what you think is going on here since you don't know the people personally but I'm wondering what other people make of it. On one hand i trust my girlfriend more than anything and believe what she's told me. Knowing her personality she isn't the type of person to cheat on someone, she would much rather break it off with someone first. On top of that i can't see her sending a random text saying she wants to screw someones brains out.
But I'm also wondering why so many people are saying somethings wrong with her and that I need to get rid of her. Would someone really make up that she sent a text to them saying she wanted to have sex with them. Like everything my friend told me tonight contradicts her personality and everything she's told me since I met her. She would never bother with cheating, she would break up with them first if she wasn't happy rather than dragging the relationship out. She believes sex is something you don't just do for fun (which is what the text was implying) but an emotional bond you share with someone special.

I just don't know what to do now for the next 4 weeks. I can't talk to her and I'm going to be sitting her just thinking about all the what-if's now.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:00 PM.

© 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!