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Re: Sick of dad :(
Aug 6, 2009
Wow, that's amazing how many people replied! I hope I may be able to also help anyone else who reads this, and can ask questions of their own.

More details - when I wrote this thread it was a very bad day. My father is a very sweet, kind man. He has never lost his temper like some, never thrown things like some have mentioned that have replied to me. He has never raised a hand to anybody or said a mean word in his life. Yes, I know he has bipolar. It has been diagnosed for years. He has had it since we were children. It has been more recently (last few years) where he has fallen deeper. He has been committed into our local mental institution. He is there now, this is the third time. The things that he does are:
- He does not take care of himself and is actually pretty... how can I say this... gross at some times, especially with his personal hygiene.
- He stays in bed all day
- He is just depressed. My boyfriend and I told the family we were getting engaged, and they were extatic, but he just made a rude comment and went to bed
- He takes valium a LOT. There was one time he took it when were were all going to the river with family friends, and their kids (who are a little younger than my youngest sibling) had to chase after him so he wouldn't do anything harmful)
- There was a question about alcohol. He came from a family who couldn't put down their beers. He can't handle social situations without being blind drunk. He doesn't drink at home or go out to drink. Just when things like a work party comes up, he'll be too shy to stay sober. We are a very sober family, though. No illegal drugs have EVER been used by anyone at any time, though I have a feeling he may have a strong fondness for his valium :(
- He is sick, but sometimes he does things for the sympathy. Eg - he will be fine, then a family friend will knock on the door and he will 'struggle' to his feet and come right up to them and look bleary-eyed. You just want to roll your eyes at his drama act, it's f...ing ridiculous. Excuse me.

It's hard to exactly tell anyone how destructive he is to the happiness of our family. We love him so much, but my mum suffers terribly. I actually do live with my fiance and my little sister. My young brother just can't wait to move out and get away from it.

Reading your comments, it seems we all suffer in different ways. My father is going to move to Melbourne to be with his sister, so he can give us a break. That is so noble of him. But of course, my aunties are treating mum like the bitch who is pushing him out. That hurts. And of course, my mum won't be receiving any financial help from him, and will have to find a smaller house.

There are so many things that he has done, but he is trying.

He is terrible with money. I have read that this can be a symptom of bipolar. He will spend cash on stupid things when my mum is already trying to pay the bills. Then he will go into a meltdown, a deep depressive meltdown if someone has something nice and expensive. My parents aren't well off, though it doesn't bother mum cuz she has a wonderful family and love. But it doesn't seem like enough for dad. Now, I am more well off than them both put together, because I have tried with my career. I have to hide nice things from him or he will become deeply depressed. All I want to know is, he has everything. We really are a lovely family. We are all highly educated, loving, caring, never been involved in crime or drugs. But he just wants... more :(

It is hard, but thank you for your replies. It has bought new light to the situation.
If you would like anymore info, or would like advice from me, let me know xx





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