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It's been almost a year now since my boyfriend had cheated on me. He made out with some skanky girl and lied to me about it how "nothing happened, rah rah rah". The girl told me herself, and said that he never came onto her, and that she came onto to him, but he never mentioned having a girlfriend (we were together 6 months at the time). Well after a couple of VERY rough months of me finding out about this, I decided to put it behind me, start over, and give him another chance. After all, as cliche as it sounds, I love him very much.

I know that "once a cheater always a cheater" can be true, and I'm not posting this so you all can tell me how wrong I was for staying with someone who lost my trust, I'm looking for advice, not what I "woulda, coulda, shoulda" done. The fact is, we stayed together. He has changed for me in such a way where he rarely, if ever, goes out without me anymore (he works all day for military and usually doesn't even have enough energy to go out anyway). In the past 9 months he has been doing everything in his power to make himself more trustworthy to me and be the greatest boyfriend I can ask for. There were points in the past not long after this incident where I thought I could never ever trust him again, no matter where he was or what he was doing...but over time, it has gotten better. The problem is, after him being away for 6 weeks now on a military base 1,000's of miles away, he has been being nothing but good (he has to work every day there too). We've talked every night on the phone, he flew me down for labor day weekend...and aside from that, the 6 months preceding him leaving were good too.

But when he mentioned that he was going out with 2 of his friends tonight to get a couple drinks, i FLIPPED because deep down, I cannot trust him as much as I HATE admitting that. And the big problem here is that he's been so good, and never goes out, so I haven't had a chance to be exposed to him going out and getting into a bad situation, because since he cheated, he has avoided these things at all costs for me (he trusts himself, but he knows I have the problem and is willing to do whatever it takes to make me happy and trusting again) This sounds like I have him on a leash, but I don't--he can go out of he wants, but he chooses not to for me.

Besides the cheating itself (which I know is a big deal) he has done nothing wrong in the past year, in fact, he's done everything right. He's my life, he motivates me to do well...It's all me holding this grudge, and I know that when I took that chance to stay with him, I had a responsibility of forgiving and moving on, but I'm having a hard time....Any advice would be greatly apprecaited.





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