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Yes, I think your boyfriend is somewhat awkward with his words. I also feel that he wants to say more to you, but perhaps he feels that the level of intimacy between you and him doesn't allow him to do it. I don't know if he is controlling, but he seems to think he is above you and everyone else for that matter in terms of discipline and self-control. He has a very high opinion of himself and usually doesn't depend on the feedback from other people. I think this is a little embarrassing for you, as if he were making himself inacessible. He also comes across as a perfectionist, but I could be wrong.

As for you, yes, I think you are a sensitive and emotional person, whereas your bf seems to be more rational. In a couple, differences are usually welcome, as long as they aren't too big so there'll be more friction than empathy.

It would help if he chose to expose his thoughts more clearly and in more thoughtful manners, and it would help if you didn't take all his remarks too personally, although you shouldn't allow resentment to build up. I think both of you need some patience to deal with each other. Can you do that? Can you manage to be patient without giving up the joy of being together?

As for bromances, well, yes, we males need them, lol. It is a natural thing, but it seems that in this case he put his buddy in the first place, unless the other guy would be driving you to the camping site and without his car you have no other ways of reaching there. I think you are entitled to question why the camping weekend was put off and you were left with a bitter smile on your face.

Oh, no, I don't think you are crazy at all, either. Actually, you express yourself very well, which crazy people usually don't.
I tend to agree with Pendulum on this one. You are not crazy; it sounds from what you say that your bf is simply uncouth. He doesn't know how to say it, and he says what comes to his mind without thinking. My bf often says things that I used to think, "What?" to and I've realized he has no malicious intent, but that's simply what's in his mind. He isn't controlling and would be upset if he thought I was offended. We are all raised in different situations, have had different life experiences, and have different ways of expressing ourselves. No one way is right (of course, controlling behaviors are not good and should be stopped early on). You both just have to learn how to communicate with each other.

Maybe next time he says something like that, you should just calmly and matter-of-factly, without seeming to even think about it, say "No, not me." Or something simple like that. Then see if he asks more questions or drops it. Nothing wrong with sometimes asking why he would say such a thing because that's part of communication. But figure out his communication style, and don't try to change him. If you find you don't like his style and can't live with it, then it's time to end the relationship.

I'll defer to the men on the bromances issue. I'd be upset, too, and you should have just calmly asked him if the two of you or some of the others could have gone without this man. You have to be very careful not to put him on the defensive, thinking you don't like his roommate. But you have a right to say you are just curious, why can't you go without the roommate.
Pendulum, that's really amazing that you can tell that much about my boyfriend just by that little amount of information I gave you. He isn't controlling, per se, but he does subtly always have to be the dominant one. A perfect anecdote for this is that if it's raining really hard, he will not just put the windshield wipers on, he will manually do it every 5 seconds if he has to, instead of just letting it do its thing. When I try to talk to him about something he said that offended me, he tends to change the subject or roll his eyes in a "joking manner". The other day he said "I'm gonna go to the grocery store later and buy some egg shells to walk on"... the lack of communication/taking responsibility for his callousness with words is really frustrating. He'll admit that what he said was wrong, but that's all he'll say about it, and I always just feel like I need more closure as to what he meant. He's an enigma and I guess he likes that about himself.

I think I can learn to be more patient and to not take everything so personally. I know that he is not out to hurt me. But he does need to learn to either be more careful with what he says, or be willing to explain himself and talk to me about it. He is not very comfortable with intimacy, making me feel like he's always just out of reach. I am getting a lot better at giving him space though, and maybe he will thus become more intimate with me.





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