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Hi, have been dating this guy on and off for 3 years. I have not seen him for 8 months since he moved to another state and for the past couple of months we were in contact again and once again I hear the same song and dance about how much he loves me and that we are destined to be together, blah, blah..

I'm not a teenager, I am 53 and he was the first relationship I had after being very sick for 10 years (I had lyme disease). He is handsome, charming, extremely intelligent and I fell for him hook line and sinker.

During the relationship I caught him in lies and I knew I should have broken it off with him but I was crazy in love with him plus he knew how to reel me back in.

Anyway, I thought by him moving and living alone that perhaps he learned a bit about relationships and we talked about our past problems and I thought we resolved everything to try to make this relationship work. In fact, he flew to my state just last week, I picked him up at the airport and for the first 24 hours we were really happy.. I was willing to forgive him for all the heartache he gave me in the past and let go..

The following day he took my car to go shopping and he left his e-mails open and I read them. If it were any other guy (like my ex-husband) I would have never read the e-mails but because this guy lied to me in the past, I wanted to confirm that he was telling me the truth this time.

I found out he was still lying to me and when he returned from shopping I calmly confronted him and told him I read his e-mails and that I was really hurt that he lied to me once again. I told him I was not going to kick him out but he could not sleep with me or touch me. He said because I don't trust him (ha, how can I trust a chronic liar?) that he was going back to his state. I said whatever you want.. He called a cab and went to his female friend (or ex-girlfriend's house) which didn't surprise me since his relationship with her caused me many problems.

So this is it. I feel stupid for even believing him again. I feel stupid for thinking that he was going to give up his female friend (who he has known for over 20 years and when he first met her they dated and had a relationship).

So why do I feel so let down? I feel really depressed and I think it's because either I am the eternal romanticist or I am angry at myself. When I knew he was coming here I let myself get so excited as we shared many fantastic times together (not just sex) but going on nature walks, art shows, restaurants, etc. We both had so much in common.. I felt closer to him than any man I ever dated or have known..

A friend of mine told me to google sociopath and I did and sure enough he fit the profile so much... Charming, intelligent, conventional, and a chronic liar who feels no remorse when he inflicts hurt on me or does something wrong.

I guess I am really venting as I let myself get reeled in again.. I don't consider myself to be a stupid person so what is wrong with me? I also don't consider myself to have low self-esteem. I tell many guys to go to h*** without a blink of the eye.


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