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[QUOTE=Tubular;4232810]As far as the other girl goes...the one I referred to as crazy ... it was almost like she was bi-polar? I mean one day she would be super happy and loving, and then an hour later she wouldn't speak to me (for half the day!) bc she thought I looked at another girl.
[/QUOTE]Tubular, it doesn't sound like bipolar. I believe your initial instincts were right, i.e., your view in your first post that she has strong BPD traits. There are several clear differences between the two disorders. Bipolar mood swings are very slow because they are caused by gradual changes in body chemistry. They are considered rapid if as many as four occur in a year. In sharp contrast, four BPD mood changes can easily occur in four days. BPD rages, for example, typically last about 5 hours and rarely as long as 36 hours.

A second difference is that the onset is very different. Whereas a bipolar change may occur over several weeks, a BPD change typically occurs in less than a minute -- often in only 15 seconds -- because it is event-triggered by some innocent comment or action. These event-triggered tantrums are what you seem to be talking about in your posts because they occur in a short time and are unpredictable -- so much so that you felt you were always walking on eggshells around this GF.

A third difference is that, whereas bipolar can cause people to be irritable and obnoxious during the manic phase, it does not rise to the level of meanness you see when a BPD is splitting you black. The difference is huge: while a manic person may regard you as an irritation, a BPD person can perceive you as Hitler and will treat you accordingly. However, if the BPD sufferer's anger is inner-directed, you will not witness a raging screaming person but, instead, a quiet withdrawn person who turns her anger onto herself.

Finally, a fourth difference is that a bipolar sufferer -- whether depressed or manic -- usually is able to trust you if she knows you well. Untreated BPDs, however, are unable to trust -- even though they sometimes may claim otherwise. This lack of trust means there is no foundation on which to build a relationship.

Moreover -- and I learned this the hard way -- when a person does not trust you, you can never trust them because they can turn on you at any time -- and almost certainly will. Significantly, most of your comments about your second exGF have to do with her jealousy, which occurs because she cannot trust anyone.

Yet, despite these four clear differences between the two disorders, many people confuse the two. The primary source of this confusion seems to be the fact that many BPD sufferers also have the bipolar disorder.





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