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I started getting really really close to one of my guy friends, then we began to get intimate . Then at a New years eve party he got with my best friend. Having not really told anyone about our relationship I couldn't really be angry at her but then everything came out him and I. He eventually asked my friend out a few months later and she said yes despite knowing how strong my feelings were.

To put a long story short, I cheated with him whilst we were both wasted. I felt so guilty but by the time I realized what had happened he'd already refuted any rumors about anything happening so I went along with it thinking it was just a one off. For the next six months he and I went from extremes of not talking for weeks even MONTHS at a time as I tried to get him out of my system, to being intimate as he repeatedly told me that it was me he liked and that he was going to break up with my friend to be with me (it really screwed with my head).

I want to make it clear that as soon as my friend started seeing this guy our friendship ended (and has never recovered). We barely spoke and when we did it was strained and forced on both sides. HOWEVER I did not do any of it out of spite, I was completely messed up over him. He is very manipulative and he knew me well enough to completely shatter my confidence. Looking back now I realize that I was completely under his control and that's exactly how he wanted it to be - it was a very emotionally abusive 'relationship' (for lack of a better word). The way I acted over those six months was completely out of character for me and it's something I regret every day. The last week of the 'affair' regrettably resulted in sexual intercourse, after this it was too much and I broke it off with him and told him not to contact me at all.

Despite the fact that I ended the 'affair' as it were and all contact (despite him trying to stay in contact) last summer I still feel so bad and guilty. The only person I've told is my BF who I've been with happily in a loving relationship for 9 months. Other than him no one else knows about it and I don't know what to do as they're still together. I just don't want my former friend to waste anymore time on him but I don't want her to get hurt either, he's also been seen cheating on her with a number of other girls (this being after I ended it with him) but no one's told her about any of those. I'm worried she'll end up wasting so much time on him.

What should I do? Should I tell her or hope they break up in their own time without her finding out and getting hurt? Am I a bad person? I think about what I did everyday.





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