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Relationship Health Message Board


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Hello everybody! I'm new here, first time posting anything on any blog ever! I have looked around at lots of sites, and I feel this is the most proffessional, and could be the most helpful. Anyway here it goes...

My boyfriend and I have known eachother since highschool. We hooked up when we were younger but nothing ever came from it. We parted ways after school, and our paths crossed again just over two years ago now. At the beginning we were taking it slow, I was fresh out of a very unstable relationship. But sparks were flying and the next thing you know we were together. I'm madly in love with my boyfriend but I feel that things are just getting worse and worse in our relationship.
So for about a year and a half of our relationship he was unemployed, and basically living with me and off me. Which obviously caused major fights and lots of animosity between us. About 3 months ago now he finally got off his buns and went and got a job. He was still staying with me almost all the time. Recently I have decided, under his suggestion, to quit my second job as a dance instructor, because I was unhappy all my free time was getting taken up. He said to me that "isn't spending time with your boyfriend important ?" Which implied to me that he would want to spend more time with me, now that things are getting better with him working and such. Now that I have quit, he is back at home living with his mother and rarely comes over anymore. I feel like he wants what he can't have and when I make myself available for him, he isn't interested.
When I try to talk to him about how I am upset, or feeling that he is distancing himself from me he just gets angry and says he is tired of having deep emotional talks all the time. He used to cuddle with me all the time, and play games and flirt with me. All of that has come to a screeching halt these days and I am feeling really insecure about this relationship. We sit on opposite sides of the couch with little to no interaction, I try to get close and he just seems put off by it. When I bring up the cuddleing issues once again he gets angry with me and says our relationship isn't a romance novel, and he's just not like that.
I might need to add in here that he has never said he loved me first, and even when I say it to him, his response is " you too, or mhmmm".
Am I a doormat and wasting my time with him? I really could use some help here. It is affecting my depression and anxiety now quite a bit, and I find myself panicing and having to medicate to deal with my stress. :confused:





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