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Re: REALLY HURTING
Sep 6, 2003
Thank you everyone for your replies. They do mean so much to me.

hapa, as someone who was probably wronged by actions similiar to mine, I totally understand why your first reaction would be to lash out. There is no excuse for what I did. My affair was not so much a physical one as it was a mental and emotional one. Yes, we did have sex on several occasions. He didn't really enjoy it to be totally honest. He always felt guilty afterward and so did I. It started so innocently. It always does I guess. The part of my relationship with him that made it so bad was the fact he was closer to me than he was to his wife. I have always known where I should be with the lord. I just kind of put him on the back burner because I wanted things the way I wanted them and I didn't want to compromise. It was when I finally turned it all over to the lord I realized that even if I'm not sleeping with this man, I am still hurting his marriage. The last letter I wrote him I told him I would would be praying for his marriage, and I do. God is awesome, and he can heal anything. I want nothing but happiness for my friend. I know he will only find it if I leave his life. I really hope that any "other women" who may be out there reading this will realize that real love is unselfish, and that sleeping with another woman's husband is nothing but, and that they hurt not only his spouse, but him as well. Live and learn and move on. We are only human, which is why we all need God.

BJ, I can't thank you enough for your kind words. It really means a lot coming from you. As another person said in a thread they started praising your wisdom, you always know what to say. You hit the nail on the head when you said maybe God was emptying out my life so he could fill it with other things. I believe that also. I am a practical nurse going to school for my RN. I also have a very active six year old. Between these things I am very busy. I want nothing more than to strengthen my spiritual walk. Even now I feel that the heaviness in my heart has been lifted some what. Thank you for your prayers.

Butterfly, Take heart! God has great things in store for us both. I spent way too long letting men interfere with what is truly important. All I need right now is Jesus. I believe that when I am stronger in him and he feels I am ready, he will present me with my soul mate. Yours is out there too. We must be patient. Its so hard isn't it? Sometimes, I forget that I still have a whole life ahead of me. I'm only 26. I get the impression you are young too. Lets just appreciate everyday as it comes. Every sunrise is a gift to us. A wise person once told me that God will generally answer us in one of three ways: Yes, No, or "Wait." I think waiting can be the hardest. You are in my prayers.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!





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