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Relationship Health Message Board


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want to b well, you are right. I do deserve someone to lean on, and I have always known this probably won't go anywhere. I think it really is just surfacing more so because its very easy for me to think that things in my life would be easier with him by my side physically. It is what keeps me going.

I have made a deadline for him to decide to meet or not. I also have to decide this as well. Deep down I do not want to meet, as I agree with him that it would be very hard to keep a relationship up with 1700 miles between us. On the breaking point, I just want to meet to get the "what if's" out like MJK98 said. I figure fate must have let me meet him for a reason, more reason then just a 4 hour chat every night pretending its okay like that.

I have dated others this past year, in fact I have another date this weekend. Even more reason to get him out of my system. I feel like I am two timing these new guys in a way. I have met a guy recently (the date tonight) and I am really looking forward to getting to know him more, so maybe this new guy will break this ugly emotional tirade we are putting ourselves through. We had a blow up the other night at each other, he wants us to be best friends and likes but is jealous that I go out with other guys. He knows exactly what I have done on my dates and what has happened. I told him he maybe just wants me because I entertain him. He got really mad at this but in the end admitted it might be true- reassuring me he still loves me for me, whether I am entertaining him or being boring. (my words)

I know how everyone is quite suspicious that he may be hiding something huge, but I honestly think he is just plain scared and doesn't want to leave me everytime sad and lonely. Even though I tell him that I always make things work if I want them too, he is pretty pessitmistic and thinks only of how sad he will feel when I leave. He keeps mentioning quote "when you leave" instead of saying when we part or when we say goodbye or even if he leaves...suggesting that his past ultra serious girlfriend left him and he can't trust me to not do the same. I am going to ask him when I talk to him next. I am on a "not talking" point with him while he makes up his mind on meeting or not.
We also plan on meeting as friends only first, with absolutely no intimacy. What do you think of that? (that was my decision)





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