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Relationship Health Message Board


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I should first state that I have been diagnosed by several psychiatrists as having depression, ocd, and anxiety. Im 32 yrs old.
I am part of an extremely close family. My brother and sister live at home and all of us went to college near home so we could commute. I always suffered from depression and social anxiety. About 4.5 years ago I was frustrated with being bored with my life, not happy with my job, not finding friends that have the same interests as me, and not being able to find a girlfriend I really loved. I always had trouble with meeting new people.
I decided to move across the country from pittsburgh to los angeles. I was extremely hard for me to leave my family. I had ups and downs but started to feel better with my new home on the beach. I was playing volleyball, surfing everyday, dating, and making many friends. My job was also going great. Almost every time I talked to my mom, dad, and brother and sister though they would tell me i should move home. Then I had a snowboarding accident that required pretty serious surgery. Being out there on the other side of the country really made me think about being so far from the people I love. So, I told them it was time for me to move back. I wasnt sure this was right so I decided to wait until I found a good job there. In the mean time I met a wonderful girl. She was extremely smart, pretty, adventurous, and we got along great. So great that we took a vacation to hawaii together and had the time of our lives. After about 4.5 mo of dating I got the job offer in Pittsburgh..my family put extreme amount of pressure on me to take it. Even though I was falling in love with this girl I took it. I told the girl I would move back at the end of the job contract of 6 mo. She actually drove with me across the country!
My time in pittsburgh has not been so great. I love being close to my family but other areas of my life are not as good. I dont have all the activities I had in LA, I dont have the nice weather, and I dont have many friends here. I tried joining activities and joining a gym but none of that really caught on for me. My realationship with my girlfriend is not doing well. we argue all the time because i am dragging this out and she says i am not showing her that i want to be with her. my job is extremely stressful. Mostly i stay at home with my parents and watch tv or go out with my brother every once in a while. my sister just got married so she isnt around much. Now I am forced to make a decision. Leave home again or stay. I need to know soon. It is driving me insane. I feel like I was so happy before i moved home, but i love my family so much its hard to leave again. My therapist hasnt been much help. She actually recently asked me if someone had a gun to my head and i had to make a decision what would i choose. My answer was id let them pull the trigger. it would be much easier for me. I feel like i had a good life out there but if things do work out with this girl i will be stuck out there forever and my relationship and if i have children their relationship with my family will not be good. I really need help. choose the fun life, or live by the people that love you????
I also have a risk taking problem. I am in extreme sports and have had so many surgeries i cant get insurance on my own now. i currently have a herniated disk in my neck from this behaviour..my family worries if im capable of being on my own and making good decisions as well.
Please help me!





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