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Relationship Health Message Board


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Hello I am at the moment suffering from a broken heart....My partner has just left me and we were going to get married and move abroad...We had a close relationship but I did what you said your partner does....I wanted more and constantly felt he should support me more..he was cold with me and very harsh... Im not saying you are like this but I do feel that becasue he was not honest with me I never had the chance to consider all the options in front of me... so Im going to give you the best advice I Know how and this is coming from someone who has been the other side and is currently broken...
Firstly you have been with this person for a long time and this can make you feel that living without this person would be easy...You have to ask yourself in the cold reality of the day ...how would you feel if you were never to see this person again? Sometimes when you make a choice you have to go through with it because there is no turning back - people get hurt and things get said and it is water under the bridge and you can spend your life regreting it...
Secondly if you partner does not know how you feel how can she make the changes and work with you...I knew nothing about how my partner felt and he lied to me about his feelings and I never had a chance to address it....my hopes and dreams were shattered as he could not go on with us...You are feeling all this alone and that itself will impact on her as she will pick up on the vibe you are not happy and this in turn will make her insecure and lash out at you. You can't carry this alone you can't make this decision on your own ...one of the most important parts of a relationship is that you talk ...you are saying basically that you can not tell her....this is not fair and you sound angry inside as you think in some way she should know this? Honesty is the only way forward and if you are frightened of how she will respond that will be the least of your pain when you let her down just before the wedding and her world comes crashing down around her. I do not know your partner but i think she knows there is something wrong and she is probably allready fully aware she has her own issues but it is human nature to run from the truth rather than waht to hear we are effecting the relationship.....You have two potions to leave and take time...but in her moind she will be so confused and feel totally rejected ....or you can talk like adults to see which way you can go....what path ...what road next to either move forward together or as spearate individuals...You both have the right to be part of that talk....otherwise one person is left gutted ....or it is both with no way back...If you need advice speak to me as I will give you a none biast view....I am sad at th moment but my gosh I know one thing it really does take two to wrch a relationship...its our lack of abilty at times to get over the rough times and build on this that makes the grass look greener on the otherside....beleive me sometimes it is and sometimes it just simply is not...





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