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Relationship Health Message Board

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Hello! I will try my best to keep this as breif as possible. I am in a pickle!

To start off, I am 20 years old, turning 21 in October. I have started dating my boyfriend in Grade 12 (2007), & so that makes us at 3.5 years of dating. We moved in together in the city in 2009 & have been living with eachother ever since... we had some ups & downs (He cheated 4 times, wont get into that.. I took him back), but for overall, it has been a good relationship.

He has a sister named Mary. (not gonna use real name) She is 23 & has been dating her bf David (again.. not real name) for 6 years. My boyfriend Jim & Mary are very close, very family oriented, but veeerrryyy overprotective.

Mary & Jake moved in with us a month ago while their house is getting built. David & I have always gotten along, for we share a lot of the same thoughts, ideas, experiences, etc.


Mary & Jim went to their home town for 5 days, leaving David & I together. We have never really got the chance to hang out & to talk, which is exactly what we did... we stayed up till 1-2 every night talking about everything.. started off very innocent.

The next weekend, Mary & Jim left us home alone again.. There is more to the story to how controlling & weird Jim & Mary can be (got one of her friends to come check on us the Friday night, but David was gone.) The Saturday however, it begam to feel different between us. It was no longer an innocent "friend" feeling... there was more. But I knew we could never do anything, we are both loyal people.

The Sunday.... we got closer & closer..... & well... he kissed me. Then, well you know the rest. It was such a passionate, powerful experience, I havent felt like that with Jim before in my life. Sad thing is...I don't feel guilty.

We text daily, we act normal around Jim & Mary, but we think about eachother 24/7... we have snuck off a few times already, & my feelings for David has grown intensely... His as well.

I have been falling out of love with Jim for a while now.... I still care about him, I still love him... but I am not sure if I am "in love" with him. Jim was the only boy I have ever slept with.. (till now.. oh boy)

David & I are not sure what exactly to do.. we both do not want to break Jim & Mary's hearts, but I can't picture myself in the future with Jim anymore... & I'm only 20 years old.. in a love triangle. Never saw that comin.

Am I a bad person? Should I follow my heart? I am the type of person who will go along with something because I dont want to hurt anyone.. but if I stay with Jim, my love for David will get to me & I will be unhappy. I'm just really scared.

Please, any advice, tips, shared experience, anything would be great! I haven't told any of my friends... I can't, not yet. The other thing is.. I don't feel guilty for cheating on Jim with David... at all. oh boy... sorry this is longer than I hoped it would be.. hope someone out there reads it!!!

Thank you!

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