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Not sure if this should be posted here or under PTSD??

About 3 months ago I met a guy (I'm 54, he's 55) and we hit it off! That's the good news. We discovered we have much in common as far as our views on life and relationships as well as enjoying the same activities, fishing, nature, tag sales, antiques, etc.

9 months ago I moved to this state and honestly didn't plan on getting involved again. I live in a rural state and nothing is close which I love because I am surrrounded by nature (one of the reasons I picked this state to live). Anyway, he has been driving 2 hours (not uncommon for this state) to see me and stays over and we really enjoy each other. I am falling for him (I don't like to use the "love" word just yet) though he feels he loves me and is not afraid to say it.

The not so good news: Since I am 17 years old I suffer from PTSD as I was run over by a car in my legs crossing a busy street and almost didn't make it. I have overcome much of my fears but not all. Anyway, I drove to his place this past Wednesday for the first time. His family (daughters, grandchild, etc.) all live near him. He owns his place where I rent mine.

When we went to sleep I started getting anxiety because he lives near an interstate (just my luck) and the sound of trucks and cars bothered me. I am really upset by this because I don't want to feel anxiety from something that happened to me so many years ago. I also don't want my fears to ruin this relationship.

Right now, the only place I am relaxed is in my place which is not fair to him. Closing his windows does not help eliminate the sounds of the interstate. I told him about the accident and how I was damaged by it and he understands but there is nothing he can do about it. I have been in therapy before and given medication which I still take today for panic disorder.

I was able to stay at his place for 2 nights though I didn't sleep very well because of anxiety. Not having enough sleep stresses me out. I don't know what to do and I don't want my problems to ruin this relationship. So now I am home and his family may be getting together for the holiday and to drive there and back in one day is too tiring. I feel very conflicted and I miss him already!

Any thoughts?
Sunny





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