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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

First and most importantly, while I agree I don't like women chasing men (and I won't ever do it), I think there's a difference between expressing interest or asking one out casually and 'chasing' them.

I wholeheartedly agree, and I've ended relationships and dates before if I end up being the only one calling, talking, returning conversation, etc. I didn't just fall off the turnip wagon, if I see it's clear they aren't interested or reciprocating, I let go. I simply asked because I really haven't had to deal with a super shy guy like this one before (shy as I have seen, and as I was told from our mutual friend I talked to about him), who says very on the fence (flirty or friendly) comments...otherwise I've never been the 'pursuer.'

To the point of men 'needing' to be the pursuer to hunt, gather, find a wife, and have kids, sure I see that point. Some of us haven't evolved much from that. that point....If that was what I wanted from a guy, I would have gotten in the car with this random guy who was hooting and hollering at me from his car as a friend and I walked down a city street (fully and not scan tally clothed, mind you) the other day.

I'm not a traditional lady...I'm busy. I work two jobs, I teach and perform dance weekly, rehearsals, etc. It's very hard to find someone who not only is understanding of this, but can share this lifestyle with their own passions and hobbies and still want to spend time with one another and share other moments..there's like a whole extra level of connection I feel goes on. I'm fairly independent, and look for that in a match as well. Part of why I like this guy is because he also is understanding and has things he is passionate about outside his day job as I do. I couldn't handle a super clingy guy. It's all about balance.

Just debating here of course, I'm not trying to be harsh or anything. I've been enjoying reading the different viewpoints.

I will summon courage and casually ask after his new show opens tomorrow night. I'll let you all know how it goes....I agree, I think it sounds like he's interested, and I think because of a event in the past perhaps he is now even more reserved about it...(someone bought me a huge bouquet of flowers last summer at a festival I work at, and he was visiting that day. I had just seen him and gave him a hug but had to leave right away to go perform. After I got off stage a flower lady delivered those and said an admirer wanted to know if I was single which at the time I wasn't. Maybe was him, maybe not...I had just seen him before, but I'm unsure)

BUT again, We shall see. I'm not afraid to be turned down, I just want to settle it at this point. :D

Rosequartz- One last ditch effort from Buffoon about a month ago. Initially we agreed to remain friends. We texted a little, and one day I texted a general hello, and he told me not to talk to him anymore. So ok, whatever, I'm not going to play that game. After a month + of no talking, he messages me online about how 'I must not value a friendship since I don't instigate ANY conversation' And how 'We can't be friends because I wouldn't break plans with other friends to go hang out with him (before the don't talk to me text I went to a movie with a group of friends and got a text from him asking me to come to the beach with him to hang out right then. Said thanks, but I couldn't. Apparently us being friends means I have to drop everything for him too!). I didn't respond to any of it, I have nothing to prove and nothing to say anymore. The iron wall is down, I feel pretty removed from the situation and pretty above it. He's trying to test waters and throws these fits when I ignore. So glad that relationship is very much over! :eek:

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