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Forgive me for such a long drawn out post; I'm sure this board has enough of those. I am gonna talk a little about my sitution though.

I have been married for almost three years to a beautiful young wife and we have a beautiful little girl. our little girl is two years old. My wife and I are both in our twenties.

My wife and I have a pretty good marriage I think. We seem to get along very well for the most part. There are a few things we don't agree on, but nothing that any other couple doesn't have either I would suspect.

Over the past few weeks, she has seemed to change. This is not my first rodeo, and I know how this goes. I've seen all the signs before so I'm more receptive to them now. I'm going to list some things my wife has been doing:

1. My wife has a very nice phone that I bought for her for her birthday last year. it is a smartphone. She hardly ever keeps up with it and it is regularly dead because she doesn't remember to charge it. She hates texting, and I have always hated that because I would love to talk to her throughout the day while we are at work. She just never cares about that kind of thing so we text very rarely. In a nutshell, she doesn't really have much interest in it. All the sudden, about a week ago, I noticed that she was glued to her phone. I assumed she was texting, because she was typing like crazy. At first I didn't say anything but as time wore on, I began to make hints that I noticed. I tried not to give myself away that I was concerned, and just told her I was glad that she was texting and that she had a friend to talk to. She has told me that she is texting a high school girlfriend, who I have met, and she seems like a nice girl....All that being said, she has kept her phone close by. whenever she gets up to do something she carries it with her. When shes's sleeping it's under her pillow. This is a far cry from what is usually the case, because most of the time it is missing in action.

2. Over the past week, she has been wearing more makeup than usual. Alot more makeup than usual. She has also been wearing her hair in different configurations than she has before. This threw a major red flag to me because she never puts on hardly any makeup. I made some comments about it, and again I tried not to give myself away that I was concerned. She just keeps telling me she's been wearing makeup like that. I'm not so sure, she is my wife, and I think I would know that kind of thing.

3. She has been way more argumentative latetly. Over the past week, she has pointed out some of my major flaws and from my past experience, this is not a good sign. When this happened to me in my other relationships, the girls were looking for a way out. Maybe a way to justify her unusual actions.

I went through her phone this morning while she was sleeping. I have been trying to get to it, but she has had it on lock down for the past few days.. Let's please not get into the discussion of whther or not this is ethical. I realize that is not a good move, and I don't condone it at all. But I feel like I don't have a choice at this point.

First of all the girlfriend she said she has been excessively texting doesn't add up. The conversations between her and that girl were probably 10-15 at the most, over the past week. I then I found something I didn't want to find. She had a text in there to that girl that said "don't say anything, but I met [i]an unamed guy[/i] on facebook, and I have been texting him". The friend then asked her why and she said "because me and (myeslf) don't do anything but argue anymore. I'm so sick of it" There was a little more in there about me and her fussing. There was also a text where she made the comment that "[i]unamed guy[/i] is really sweet.

I looked through her facebook messages, and found a couple of messages exchanged from her and [i]unamed guy[/i], and one where he left his number and told her to text him.

So, there are no texts from him or her going out in her message log. This obviously leads me to believe that she has been texting him - she admitted it to her friend - and deleting them.

I am a nervous wreck right now, and don't know what to do next. If something is going on between her and [i]unamed guy[/i], I don't know if she is just talking to him, or if it is more serious. I realize it could be harmless, just friends talking..but the circumstances don't add up for it to mean that it is harmless..She doesn't really have time to go and physically cheat, because she always has our daughter with her. I know that isn't a reason to believe she wouldn't, but still a good reason why I think she wouldn't. I suspect that if something is going on between them, it has just started. I think I may have caught it early enough to do something about it before I lose my marriage, but I don't know.

As far as I know, I don't think she knows I've gone through her phone. I'm afraid to ask her friend about it, because I'm afraid she will go back and tell my wife I'm snooping. I don't know if I should sit back and wait, or what I should do.

Any advice would be appreciated Very Much.





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