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Relationship Health Message Board

Relationship Health Board Index

Sorry to hear about your problems with your GF Joe. I am going through the same thing with my BF of 14 years and we are not kids. He's become obsessed with survival stuff and stockpiling (I call it hoarding) food, ammo, equipment, etc. Seems like every nook and cranny is filled with something and I'm tired of it. The thing is that we live in my house and I'm always the one compromising also. I finally cleaned the garage last week and it angered him because I did...Claims he can't find anything, but he hasn't a clue as to what's even in there. I boxed up about 15 copy paper boxes worth of food and that doesn't even count the 12' long cabinet that is filled to the gills. Plus I have a huge dutch barn that is filled with all his stuff that he hasn't even touched since I've known him. He's becoming obsessed with stuff and I don't know how to approach this subject. He thinks I'm trying to get rid of his stuff, when I just want him to stop buying any more. We have enough. Add to that that he does nothing to help me around the house except cut the grass and I'm getting tired of doing it all by myself. We haven't spoken in a week and a half and I'm really dreading having to have this talk, but today will be the day. Ironically, he has his own house that just became empty and I have a feeling that maybe he'll move out, but honestly, I think he's too lazy to move everything that he has. I'm furious, but mostly hurt that he won't take my feelings into consideration. Sorry for the long story, but I do sympathize with you. I think, like me, if you can't agree and the other person is not willing to compromise, the relationship is not going to work. You will end up feeling resentment and that builds over time which is not good, because then you feel like you will explode when you finally do try to talk to them and then you end up playing the blame game or saying things that you can't take back. I plan on keeping my cool, keeping my voice soft, but basically letting him know that I am not willing any longer to keep things status quo. Best of luck to you......I think we both deserve better than what we're getting out of our relationships. I divorced my ex after 28 years of marriage and it will suck to be by myself, but I'd rather be happy alone than miserable with someone. Take care.

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