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Can't move on! Help
Mar 18, 2013
Last week my boyfriend of 14 months broke up with me. I am trying very hard to forget him, trying so hard not to let this eat away at me but it is. He is in my every thought, I dream about him at night, I wonder what he is doing during the day, i just can't seem to let go. I think of all the things we had planned for this summer andhow great it was going to be, and now i am left alone. I text him, I call him and he answers me but i know there is not getting back with him.

This isn't the first time he has done this, he broke up with me in October over a decision i made to be with my family instead of his. we got back together around my birthday a month later and i thought all was well. we spend christmas and new years together. talked about the future. then out of the blue last sunday he text me that something was missing and he wasn't into this right now, that is after i spent the entire weekend with him, not knowing anything was wrong or missing. I was happy when we were together, we laughed alot and were very close. He said that he can't forget what happened in october andmaybe it is selfish for him not forgetting and moving on but he can't. says i hurt him alot and he can't look past it.

This past saturday, he was down right nasty to me, telling me to never reach out to him again and to go way. that he didn't need me, he doesn't want me. saying that he doesn't care anymore and he needs to just move on. that i am only a good person when it fits the situation. the following day he apologized, said he didn't want to talk about it but it was harsh and i didn't serve it. of course i accepted and still have this unhealthy need to be with him.

we have both been divorced before. he has three children and is 11 yrs older then me. I always did things that he wanted to do, quad riding, boating with is family, watching him play softball. he was not really around my family too often and when i wanted him to be there christmas eve, one hour before dinner, he told me he couldn't make it, him and his son were having a good time and didn't want to leave his house. I forgave him and still drove 50 min after my families evening to be with them, because i wanted to be a part of that with them. I devoted 14 months to him, sometimes, yes i went out with my friends or on a family vacation, but for the most part we were inseparable. for the past 5 months, if i wasn't with him, then i was alone at home waiting for him to call me.

I want to know how to move on, if i should move on? every bone in my body wants to be with him. if he asked me back today i would in a heartbeat, even though my friends and family say that he is toxic and he is controlling. I just want him in my life and this is slowing killing me inside. he was my one true love, my life, how do you move on from that?

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